a chav is a person who is a complete twat and goes around terrorising people. the girls wear/look like : trackies, usually pregnant, soon to be pregnant, or already has a child/children. they wear tacky gold necklaces of a clown or doll. either that or "MASSIV" gold chains. the hands of a chavette are usually heavily adourned with gold rings or soverings which are absolute bollocks. the shoes chavettes like to wear are K Swiss, Lacoste, Fred Perry or some other bag of wank bollocks. The jackets they wear are either Berghaus, Helly Hansen or some other "designer" make. their faces are caked in make up to hide the uglyness and the hair is heavily straightened with the hottest straighteners you can get. possibly GHDs. the girls always accuse perfectly normal, cool people, such as grebs or emos, of "givin them evils". i get several people at school saying to me, "what u lookin at" or my personal favourite, "why wer u givin me evils in PE." OH MY FUCKING GOD. there is no rest. the boys wear trackies, thick woolly socks which their trackies are tucked into. they wear the same shoes and coats as the girls. also reebok, and adidas, nike and other sports shoes are worn. the boys will usually ask out girls who are lovely people, but not quite "a fit bird". i have had people ask me out before and it is so fake. it's pretty obvious these people have nothing better to do. the boys will leer at girls and call people such as emos, or alternatives, "slags". i am still trying to figure out...

Its easy to recognize a slump bitch but sometimes they can be hard to describe so I've put together a list of characteristics that you can use to describe the slump bitches you see on a daily basis. If you can apply 2 or more of these to your daily life, you might be a slump bitch.

1. Have bad posture
2. Drag you heels when you walk
3. Wear sweats to subway
4. Are over weight
5. Still wear scrunchies
6. Sport the "socks n sandals" combo in public
7. Scratch you vagina in public
8. Shop at Wal-Mart 3+ times per week
9. Have pajamas on at 12 noon
10. Your "going out" clothes consist of baggy jeans and a t-shirt
11. On Jersey Shore you would be considered a "grenade"
12. Laundry is something you do less than 3 times per month.

*Remember a slump bitch has to have at least 2 of these qualities.

Most of the time slump bitches are girls but every once in a while you find a guy scratching his vagina in the frozen food section.

These are the main characteristics of a slump bitch. I'm sure there are many more. Please send your slump bitch characteristics to michael.kay11@gmail.com.

Keep an eye out for a slump bitch near you!

From the Greek (nou-) para- lazy; + botti - bum. Someone who makes out they're too ill to do anything when they're at home and then when they get out the front door they're fit and healthy all of a sudden!