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An INCREDIBLY ignorant and egotistical species. Claims to have "invented" all things that it benefits from, and is the first species to put FOOD under lock and key, making it a commodity.
The armadillo was killed by a human in its automobile.
by Adrian June 18, 2003
55 14
A fictional race of Argonimorphic apes, presented in books, movies, tales and in the real life. Humans are warm-blooded, soft-skinned, flat-faced, ugly mammals, who tent to make things that are beautiful ugly. The apes are rather unintelligent (the average intelligence quotient is 100), their main obsessions are domination, copulation (population over 6.600.000.000 and is still growing, it probably will until the apes run out of food, this obsession can also leads to deviations, which is some sort of a psyche decease or highly dangerous side effect), social integration (the more friends they have - the better it is). They are treacherous, best not to trust them. The aggression level is so high that they can't get on without killing each other, every excuse is good to start a military conflict, or at least humiliate the opposing side and show one's domination over the other side. Also, humans are very weird, for example, in a face to face contact to communicate you have not only use words, but also mimics, gesticulation and the so called, overall "body language". All in all, they have a tendency for over expression of their feelings, yet sometimes they seem to have no real feelings at all or have extremely shallow feelings. Some of them also believe in "faith", which is a thing that serves as an excuse for their mistakes and wrong life decisions. Most of the human governments, if not all of them, are Kleptocratic.

Humans also have very weird sense of beauty, they consider ugly things (for example: snow mountains) as "breath taking". In most cases they can't even use the simplest logic. Paradoxically, everything in their life must be in a perfect order, everything must have a number, a name, every single item has its very own place in their homes, work places or wherever. They also like lots of entertainment and they can't remain serious when required. It is also worth noticing that in the human societies the Emotional Quotient (also known as EQ, also known as inter personal intelligence or emotional intelligence) is far more important than the actual Intelligence Quotient, in other words: it's better if you are charming than if you are intelligent. Humans have created over 3.000 languages and there are more than two hundred countries. The reason why humans don't want to unite is unknown, although they use excuses such as "culture", "languages" and few other things. In human societies being cynical is perceived as a disadvantage, a bad element of personality. Humans are also very ignorant and arrogant.

A very good example of their ignorance is fiction they create. For some unknown reasons they think that other sentient races - if they, of course, exist, are exactly same as them. A perfect example of this are the fan-made Argonian related modifications for the video game The Elder Scrolls IV: Oblivion, where humans are showing their lack of most basic knowledge and logical reasoning by mistaking reptiles with mammals et cetera.

The only hope for stopping this madness is the nuclear weapons arsenal, which is possessed by some countries, such as Pakistan, India, France, United States, China, United Kingdom or Russia.

Note: This is not a sarcastic entry.
You piece of human!
by Tekeeus March 21, 2008
1294 268
Self-absorbed animals in clothes.
Chimpanzee: This planet might actually be pretty cool if those pompous, pretentious, selfish humans weren't running around like they owned the show. Wait, I'm an animal... how the hell am I talking?
by TheVoiceOfReason June 25, 2005
875 235
The doom of this planet.
"Humans are nothing but fucking viruses with shoes."
by Crapper McGee March 27, 2004
735 122
A species of idiots that, unfortunately, WE ALL belong to.

"Humans are complete and utter buffoons."
by Nanakase September 29, 2003
789 241
The smartest creature in the world that still acts like a dumb animal from time to time.
Apparently, human civilization prefers stupidity for a survival trait, and merely uses the geniuses as instruments for inching along human progress.
by AYB June 23, 2003
690 271
Incredibly arrogant creatures who seem to think that they are the only species on this planet.
The human race will eventually destroy itself, as well as the rest of the planet.
by PeachyKeen July 10, 2003
514 193
Bipedal creature found on Earth. First creature in the biosphere to succesfully refine abstract thought into more than the ability to lie and/or delude itself, humans developed the technique of picturing the way things might be and then planning ways to make reality fit the pattern.

This faculty turns in upon itself, however, when the attempt fails, leading to such emotional conflicts as self-loathing, bias against more succesful others, self-worship, or sublimation of individualism into a group mind.

Humans have borrowed many traits from other species such as hunting for pleasure ( from cats and squids ), enslaving other species ( from ants ), protecting and nurturing other species to gather products from them ( from ants ), spoiling other creatures habitats by their own constructs ( from beavers ), and creating and sharing habitats with other creatures ( from corals, rodents and birds ). Humans have invented several concepts for themselves, such as artistic endevour for its own sake, resource gathering and stockpiling for its own sake, ignorance and self-delusion as a natural right, love and attraction not solely for the purpose of reproduction, worship of the different, lack of diversity as a positive, and worship of the identical.

Humans are capable of percieving that they are less than what they imagine themselves to be. This is not only their major problem, it is also their major strength.
" Some say modern humans are smarter than cavemen, some say we are less. I think we are exactly as smart as cavemen, and that is pretty smart indeed".
by D F Stuckey July 05, 2004
535 237