A time when it is so cold outside that even Jesus Christ would complain about the cold.
See also: Jesus Hot, Jesus Cold, Jesus Lot, Jesus Sweet, Jesus Late, and Jesus Early

A time when it is so hot outside that even Jesus Christ would complain about the heat.
See also: Jesus Hot, Jesus Cold, Jesus Lot, Jesus Sweet, Jesus Late, and Jesus Early

the punch line of an insult used in northern New Jersey during the 60's and 70's. made no sense then, makes no sense now, but still kind of funny.

Someone so incredibly hot and hunk-i-licious that you can't sleep in the same bed with them otherwise you will be overcome with sweat and desire.

The darkest day in mankind history. Forced to pick the gold that grew from the sacred Mongolian tree, Mongolians rushed to be the first to gather the sweet nectar bars of currency. As ladders did not exist, people were flung via catapults in order to rach the branches. The success rate of hitting the tree and avoiding a plummenting splatty death was .01%. The lucky few who made it on to the trees would be poked to death by the waiting Mongolians' sticks and cell phones. Only man mongonlian participating survived the battle, Sum yung-mahn, received the 75 gold bars the tree possessed, and then proceeded to burn down the tree with a box of matches, perventing others from returning for a second gold growing. Since gold grows on Trees and is not a mineral, it would take rare gold seeds to replenish the source years later. When Sum tried to cash in his effort, he was shcoked to find that Mongolia has just be taken off the gold standard. Now holding useless bars of tree metal, Sum Yung-mahn was a poor broken man. He lated invented Buddism.

1) One of the states of the United States of America.
Home to a bunch of formerly bad but now improving pro sports teams, a ton of colleges, the OSU Buckeyes, actual buckeyes, part of the Rust Belt, Cedar Point and a lot of soybeans, cows, and corn.
Ohio contains a little bit of all the typical Midwestern environments- college towns, suburbs, cities, urban areas trying to reinvent themseles, farmlands, etc. It also contains part of Appalachia, and a large number of "swing voters". It has quite a few ardent liberals and conservatives, and has been the home and/or birthplace of eight presidents. The weather, it being part of the Midwest region, is often "crazy" and swings between hot, mild, cold, and freezing. The four seasons are widely known to be "winter, still winter, almost winter, and construction" or something to that effect (believed to be taken from a Jeff Foxworthy chain email).
There's definitely a lot more there than bad drivers, "hicks", and cows, and just driving through the state does not really do it justice. You've got to experience it to really understand it, and then you can pass judgement.
2) A song written by Neil Young (while he was working with Crosby, Stills, Nash, and Young) in response to the

Small convenient stop off point generally found just off highway exits. Sometimes stayed at after a long drive or after picking up that STD infested hottie on the street corner for a quickie. The wallpaper consists of dull colours and patterns of those used in the 1970’s. The bed is one grade up from the comfort of one found in a prison cell and still has a short trail of sperm hanging from the lower corner from the previous occupants’ adventures from the night before. Bathrooms occasionally have locks on the door and are just big enough so that when you open the door, there is about 1cm between it and the bath tub. Toilet paper is single-ply and comes off in small individual squares and shower curtains are brown, sticky, moldy, and never long enough to reach from one wall to the other leaving a puddle of water for when you get out. Finding the right combination of hot and cold to get a decent temperature is near impossible. Turn the tap a fraction too far and the chorine water is hot enough to sear the eyeballs from your skull. If you didn’t bring any shower gel with you, don’t worry. Some is provided for you in convenient little sachets. These things are great and leave your body feeling sticky and dirtier than it did before.