1. v. To socially isolate youth to the point of causing dysfunction in present and future interpersonal relationships.

2. n. An unaccredited repository for sheltered children where students receive parental "academic instruction" of questionable quality in such reputable fields as "creation science", "bible history" and "abstinence-only sex education".

(Definition excludes nonreligious home-education, which is confined to children of hippies living off the grid and ethnographers conducting research in remote islands in Oceania. Less than .1% of the total homeschooling population.)
1. Parent: Homeschool my children? I'd rather not have them end up as friendless virgins in their mid-twenties, believing Jesus rode around on dinosaurs.

2. College Admissions Officer: So, where did you graduate from high school?

College Applicant: I went to homeshool.

College Admissions Officer: Wonderful! For some inexplicable reason, although you have had no formal instruction in science, critical thinking or literature, I invite you to join our institution. What this nation's post-secondary education system really needs is more maladjusted young people believing in apocalyptic world-views with better knowledge of firearms than physiology.
by dark289 April 15, 2009
Top Definition
If you know someone with a matter-of-fact attitude who regularly makes awkward jokes/statements out of turn, exhibits hyper-White characteristics, or simply possesses a number less-than-desirable eccentricities, this is likely the agency to blame.
"I found out that Noah was homeschooled. Everything about him suddenly makes sense."
by Chief Slap-a-Ho of the Arapaho December 23, 2009
Someone smart enough to get out of sitting through the daily 7 hours of bullshit our nation calls "school". Generally the all-around coolest people ever, along with being the best educated element of society.

Typically hated by governments who want to indoctrinate youth, and clueless fucktards who secretly wish they didn't have to go to school either.
Damn! That homeschooled guy just got laid twice last night! Too bad the guys who go to school are socially inert, castrated sheep, or they could have some fun too...
by Homeschooled And Proud November 04, 2005
Everybody is like: ''It sounds like so much fun! You can hang out at the mall with your friends all day long!''.
No. Being Homeschooled is FAR from fun. I've been Homeschooled since the second grade, and it is so depressing.
It's great for the first 3 months, and then reality hits.

Basically, you oversleep every morning because what's the sense of waking up early unless you want to be stuck watching some Weather Channel. And then you do schoolwork for 1-3 hours.

Then after that there's nothing left to do except sit on the couch and watch TV for HOURS. ON. END. And go on Urban Dictonary and Facebook and eat junk food.

And eventually, you get so lonely that you go online and join every social network site possible, and then meet a bunch of online friends that you will never meet but you don't care because YOU WANT SOMEONE TO TALK TO! And that's basically your only social life. The computer. Social Network Sites. Online friends. And Cyber Bullying.

What a life...
And if your a failure at school, your Mom spends 30 minutes screaming at you about how you should atchually pay attention to your work and do it better and then you end up getting grounded, leaving you back to watching endless hours of TV and eating.

The ONLY way to get away from your parents and crazy family is to pretty much lock yourself in your bedroom or go for a walk.
So yeah, if you want to spend your teenage years depressed, lonely, lazy, and bored, I highly reccomend you DO NOT BECOME HOMESCHOOLED!
''Ha. Look at that suicidal girl, she must of been homeschooled''.
by Skinnychick August 23, 2011
1. a form of schooling devised by parents who feel that somehow they can provide a better education to the kids than a trained teacher.

2. how parents of teenage celebrities get their kids out of school.

3. a clever way to keep your son/daughter a virgin until high school

1. Father: so are we sending jack to a private or public school?
Mother: well, i thought we'd homeschool him, that way we can make sure he never develops his own beliefs!

2. tv reporter (to the JoBroHos or Jonas Brothers): so what school do you go to?
JoBroHos: well, we're homeschooled (all wink)

3. Dad: well, i thought about sending janie to a celibacy clinic, but i decided just to homeschool her..
by victim of homeschooling November 24, 2009
The best way to secure the fact that you're going to spend your teenage years a depressed, lonely, suicidal wreck who'll spend there days watching tv and stealing their dad's Klonopin and vodka. Occasionally you actually do school work, but you usually just cheat cause it's a computer program and all you need is a password to get the answers. Which is defidently not good considering that you weren't that smart to begin with and will spend your life in a minimum wage job due to the the fact that you have no dreams or expectations for life. This is as good as it's gonna get.

This isn't the case for everyone, some homeschool kids have parents that, you know, bother to actually homeschool them and give a shit if they take 4 sleeping pills a night because they've got no reason to wake up, and it's much easier to sleep your life away instead of having to deal with the anxiety and disapointments of the outside world.

Also, some people don't hate themselves and the rest of the world.
person 1: Dude, my parents are gonna homeschool me, Yes, I can't wait to get to sleep in late and go to the mall during the weekday when there's no crowds! super fun!

me:Yeah..it is fun at first...until 9 months go by and you end up sleeping all day because you've got nothing else to do and you've practically destroyed any social skills you had because you've gone so long without human contact. Super fun indeed.
by 078567368684 May 24, 2007
the worst thing ever that will have you depressed in your teenage years, locked up in your room and crying yourself asleep. i am homeschooled and now i see no point in waking up every day.
lucille: hey so how is school going?
me: pretty good. exept for the fact that i havent any friends, my mom yells at me all day and so does my dad, i am bored most of the time, i hate my life, i will never have decent social skills or a boyfriend or go to parties, i cannot go to school because my dad says it is a horrible slow paced world in there, i can never escape my mom ect...
lucille: well that sounds nice... thats what you get for being homeschooled.
me: i hate you sooo much right now.
by octopusthighs November 16, 2011
the leading producer of those anti-social kids who live with their moms and are level 20,000 world of warcraft players
dammit, i just got pwned on world of warcraft. FUCKIN homeschoolers
by munch munch munch May 24, 2007
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