a creepy, lanky, awkward, or eccentric mother fucker.
Stanifer is such a fucking goon! look at his lanky creep ass in the corner
by Leslie Noble Devotie January 04, 2014

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In soccer, a player who lacks any sense of the game, has little to no skill, and plays simply through brute force and athletic ability alone. "Goons" usually try to play by slide tackling as often as possible.

This player will also lack any "soccer swag" and can usually be spotted from his outfit. A typical goon uniform will consist of Wal-mart brand cleats, overly big shin-guards with ankle protectors and a baggy jersey. Sometimes, but not always, can also be spotted with "sweet spot" lace holders, rec-spec glasses, and basketball head bands.

These players usually have had no training in the sport outside of their high-school or recreational teams. Most "goons" also will deny the fact that they are one repeatedly.
Peter: "Yo man, we just beat FC Burn this weekend 5-0. Team was full of goons"
Frank: "Yeah dude they suck dick, kid's were all over the field slide tackling left and right."
by peterloooose October 30, 2011

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One that stumbles around with shitkickers on, yelling out profanity at innocent people, smoking lots of pot, have crazy amounts of unprotected sex and railing lines upon lines of the finest cocaine while crushing racks on racks on racks of Natty and Jack Daniels. Ussualy wears black/raiders gear. Phil Taylor is their hero.
Phil Taylor, Trent Richardson, Tripp Whatley, Goons
by Shitkickers October 29, 2011

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cheap wine from a wine bladder.
known to be drunk by cheap people, bogans and abos.
dude1"that abo over there with 1 thong on is drinking goon."
dude2"lol of course he is hes abo!"
by beejftw October 30, 2008

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Members of Something Awful, unfunny.
Goons love to make fun of suffering, as long as it's not their own. When it is, they expect "goondolences". Pathetic.
by Lig Na Baste June 12, 2008

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Generally a Goon is a member of the Goon Squad - a Squad claimed, but re-recreated by the rap guru Plies. Interestingly, in this sense, a Goon is someone who intimidates, but enthralls. When a Goon is a Goon there is generally no question. The instinctual behavior of a Goon is quite unique. To be honest, it is well known among the Goon Squad that talk is cheep, money is money, and a fight is due when necessary. However, even knowledge is power, and a weapon.

In all honesty, soldier is a soldier, a soldier is not a Goon. The proclaimed ranking "definition" is more than questionable. Ranking order is just as with all.
"Well, I wouldn't fuck with that nigga, he's a goon."
by LeeLee FallenAngel July 19, 2014

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Someone who is totally unpredictable and ridiculous
That dude in the Christmas sweater was a total goon!
by Shibs92 November 06, 2011

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