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Someone (typically a male teen) whose primary physical attribute is lankiness. To qualify for goonness, one should be 6 feet 3 inches or over, and should not weigh in excess of 150 pounds.

Goons often have long limbs to accentuate the lankiness.
Bob's skill in basketball is primarily a result of him being a goon.
by Jeff Hunt from HollandNY July 25, 2008

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two definitions:

1. according to the hip hop community, a bad ass thug who doesn't take shit from anyone



2. a big, strong, clumsy, dimwitted henchman hired to be the muscle for anyone with money and the need to take care of his petty business like extortion or enforcement. Basically guys that do dirty work

1."ah yeah nigga I'm a goon, can't nobody fuck with me"

2. "yeah Fat Tony got the location and sent a couple of goons to put their lights out"
by devons28 November 02, 2008

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cheap wine from a wine bladder.
known to be drunk by cheap people, bogans and abos.
dude1"that abo over there with 1 thong on is drinking goon."
dude2"lol of course he is hes abo!"
by beejftw October 30, 2008

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Members of Something Awful, unfunny.
Goons love to make fun of suffering, as long as it's not their own. When it is, they expect "goondolences". Pathetic.
by Lig Na Baste June 12, 2008

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thug to be hired by a mob boss or higher authority to do sum 'DIRT'
my goon did my work for me
by blazest the mostest February 10, 2008

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Generally a Goon is a member of the Goon Squad - a Squad claimed, but re-recreated by the rap guru Plies. Interestingly, in this sense, a Goon is someone who intimidates, but enthralls. When a Goon is a Goon there is generally no question. The instinctual behavior of a Goon is quite unique. To be honest, it is well known among the Goon Squad that talk is cheep, money is money, and a fight is due when necessary. However, even knowledge is power, and a weapon.

In all honesty, soldier is a soldier, a soldier is not a Goon. The proclaimed ranking "definition" is more than questionable. Ranking order is just as with all.
"Well, I wouldn't fuck with that nigga, he's a goon."
by LeeLee FallenAngel July 19, 2014

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Someone who is totally unpredictable and ridiculous
That dude in the Christmas sweater was a total goon!
by Shibs92 November 06, 2011

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A goon is best defined as a person taking part in activities such as jumping, yelling and imitated sexual acts. Goons often commit these atrocities in public and bring embarrassment to themselves and others. Other characteristics of goons include excessive genitalia exposure, over-excitement concerning video games, and friendly relationships with parents, occasionally to the point of desired intimate contact. You can accurately distinguish a goon from a normal person by their laugh as well as their indifference to the apparent disgust surrounding them.
Goon: Lets Play HALO!
Goons: YEA! At your house though, b/c your mom is HOT!

Goon: Get HER!
GWNALINE : HELP MEEE

Goon: EE EE EE EE

Goon: *teabags sleeping friend
by xXSCUMXx September 15, 2009

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