Someone (typically a male teen) whose primary physical attribute is lankiness. To qualify for goonness, one should be 6 feet 3 inches or over, and should not weigh in excess of 150 pounds.

Goons often have long limbs to accentuate the lankiness.
Bob's skill in basketball is primarily a result of him being a goon.
by Jeff Hunt from HollandNY July 25, 2008
Cheap wine, purchased in a cask.
Got pissed on goon, used the goon bag for a pillow afterwards.
by Sonic Blip February 13, 2005
a person who can be used for personal benefit
Kathy: I need help with my math WebWorK... Better call one of my goons!"
by porkchops102 February 13, 2014
a creepy, lanky, awkward, or eccentric mother fucker.
Stanifer is such a fucking goon! look at his lanky creep ass in the corner
by Leslie Noble Devotie January 04, 2014
Noun. A man or woman who lives under the slide at your local park. They typically eat squirrel meat and trash. They enjoy snorting coke, smoking crack, and occasionally drop acid.
Mom: "You stay away from that crazy goon at the park, honey"
Kid: "OK Mom, but why?"
Mom: "Because that goon stabbed three kids last year."
by Shmuzzle 1 November 18, 2013
One that stumbles around with shitkickers on, yelling out profanity at innocent people, smoking lots of pot, have crazy amounts of unprotected sex and railing lines upon lines of the finest cocaine while crushing racks on racks on racks of Natty and Jack Daniels. Ussualy wears black/raiders gear. Phil Taylor is their hero.
Phil Taylor, Trent Richardson, Tripp Whatley, Goons
by Shitkickers October 29, 2011
Members of Something Awful, unfunny.
Goons love to make fun of suffering, as long as it's not their own. When it is, they expect "goondolences". Pathetic.
by FlowersInMidgar2 June 12, 2008
the ulitmate in alcoholic beverage. $9= 4 litres. awsome value and quality buy. comes in a sliver sack known for its healing powers, gets u wasted fast and taste like shit. also looks like apple juice so it's easily concealable.
cop says 'hav u got goon?'
u say 'no'
cop says ' wat is it'
u say 'apple juice'
cop says 'okay' (and beleives u LOLOLOLOLOLOLOL)
by fjsnvdskdavnvskanvask,vsa August 23, 2007

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