Someone (typically a male teen) whose primary physical attribute is lankiness. To qualify for goonness, one should be 6 feet 3 inches or over, and should not weigh in excess of 150 pounds.

Goons often have long limbs to accentuate the lankiness.
Bob's skill in basketball is primarily a result of him being a goon.
by Jeff Hunt from HollandNY July 25, 2008
Well-known slang term in sexual subculture of chronic and compulsive masturbators, used both as a verb and a noun. Means achieving the trance-like blissful state reached when riding the edge of cumming for as long as possible, perhaps many minutes or even hours at a time. Also denoting the absence of control, compulsively pursuing that feeling as a avid masturbator. The term has been in frequent use for at least ten years, perhaps emerging from the physical look of one who is "gooning" or "in the goon," which is a self-possessed, glassy eyed stare of stupidity (thus, an oaf). Also known as "bator mush" and "slain in the bate."
There I was, stroking for hours, and I was into the goon so deep that a bomb could have gone off next door, and I would not have noticed.

Whenever we masturbate together, I like to watch him goon on his penis ... he really gets into it.
by Anonymous94611 December 20, 2006

1) A generally low ranking member of a gang or syndicate. Typically the recipients of street-level work. These are generally the most disposable members of a organization, built to take the fall in order to protect the higher ups in the case of illegal activities gone awry that have attracted police attention.

2) One who participates in vandalism, loitering, public displays of ignorance, outward obnoxiousness, and other non-socially acceptable practices justified by a directionless but nonetheless strong pack mentality and conformity with other similarly outlandish behaving individuals.

3) An Individual of sub-standard wit or mental competency. commonly identified by a less than reputable character, bad personality, and/or poor taste in personal style.
1. The building was set a flame by some of the 2Trill Gang's goons.

2. "those damn goons keep taking shits on my lawn and ruining my grass!"

3. "Nah don't invite Keenan, he's a straight up goon"
by A Man Amongst Sheep April 24, 2012
Cheap cask wine, often consumed by teens at parties with the soul purpose of getting very drunk, very fast. The Goon is removed from the cask and transported in the internal "Goon Sack".
I was just drinking some goon. Tasted awful, but got me off my tits.
by pelaco December 14, 2009
Someone who is silly/goofy and just acts out of the norm. Usually associated with shorter girls of Latin decent. Also the term was coined by A.J. Kelly a dashing gentlemen of the highest class and swag.
Friend 1: Valeria is so weird
Friend 2: Ya for sure brah she's a Goon!
by Swagmaster Flash420 December 17, 2013
Unskilled, socially outcast worker employed to collect TV licence revenue on behalf of the BBC, who then use it to fund overpaid executives and sexually-deviant talent. Paid the minimum wage and relies heavily on commission earned selling TV licences. Likes to pretend they are an "officer" on official Government business, but TV Licensing goons are actually privately employed by a company called Capita. TV Licensing goons are undesirable visitors, having no more visiting rights than a pikey selling low-cost electrical goods.
I told that TV Licensing goon to fuck right off, because I don't watch any TV programmes.
My mate Kev is such a thick cunt he'd struggle even to get a job as a TV Licensing goon.
by Goonhilde's Gynaecologist July 31, 2013
Cask wine. Cheap shit that tastes like shit but fucks you up. comes in red and white, many varieties and textures.
"I was on the goon last night" or "im a goon warrior hear me roar"
by Trozza March 23, 2006
cheep wine or 'bubbly goon' means cheep champagne. 'goon bag' is a cask wine. The colour (white/red) is irelevant, but must be cheep.
I got pissed on goon last night.
by mike October 27, 2001

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