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13.
George Carlin is currently in his 70's and has one hell of a resume. Grew up in New York, went to catholic school(now an athiest), got booted from the military, became a disc jokey, than a stand-up comedian who appeared many many times on television.

He has appeared on Jonny Carson's show almost more than any other, was the first host of Saturday Night Live, the founder of the Seven Dirty Words, has 14 HBO specials which is just incredible. Has been in a few films as well, and had a t.v. show that only lasted for I think a year or two. Still tours all across The U.S., does many shows in Vegas, and etc.

George Carlin is the funniest and most original comedian in standup history. Not to mention one of the best and smartest philosophers the world has ever seen. This man is a true genious and tells it like it is. Everything this man has done is great. From his silly humor and little observations on life to his philosophical viewpoints and great ranting on government, religion, society, americans, bullshit, and more. You couldn't ask for any more from such a great human being.

George Carlin quotes:

"Hey, how's everyone doing tonight huh?? Good, well FUCK YOU!!" Just tryin' to make you feel at home."

"All the kings horses and all the kings men, couldn't put humpty dumpty back together again. That's because there is no humpty dumpy, and there is no god."

"I can prove to you that rape can be funny. Picture Porky pig, raping Elmer Fudd. Hey, why do you think they call him Porky!?"
by BigTMoney March 13, 2008
 
1.
Since 9/11, he has been the only stand-up comedian worth listening to. If not for him, we would probably have even less of a first ammendment than we have now. His message has always been that if you dont want to hear something, then you don't have to listen.
Oh beautiful, for-smoggy skies, insecticided grain, for strip-mined mountain's magesty, above the asphault plane, america, america, man sheds his waste on thee, and hide the pines with billboard signs, from sea to smoggy sea
by PhatRyan August 24, 2004
 
2.
The comedy king who ccan out-funny ANY comedian that has ever set foot uopn this planet!
They're going to ban the toy guns..AND THEY'RE GONNA KEEP THE FUCKIN REAL ONES!!
by James Lowe May 07, 2004
 
3.
Three steps above comedy.
The guy in the Greatful Dead t-shirt and the Fuck You hat agrees with me.
by Simon Says Go Fuck Yourself February 16, 2004
 
4.
The funniest man in America. No wait, the world. Not only is he funny, but all of his jokes, rages, and swear words tell the truth. He's a genius, and I salute him.
"We also like bombing brown people! Not because they're terrorists...just because they're brown! Seriously! When did we last bomb white people, when was the last time ANY white people were bombed? Huh? The Germans! And that was simply because they were trying to cut into our action! Dominate the world, BULLSHIT, that's OUR FUCKING JOB! We can't make a decent fucking car, but we can bomb the shit out of your country all right!"

George Carlin is a genius...there's no other way to explain it.
by Fox Mantoek January 27, 2006
 
5.
The originator of "Truth Comedy," and the One True God
"I wouldn't fuck her with a stolen dick!"
by the_ruiner June 17, 2004
 
6.
May 12, 1937 – June 22, 2008
Most intelligent American that ever lived.
R.I.P, George Carlin.
by DonZabu July 10, 2008
 
7.
The funnyest damn person alive today.
"Cheese tits"
by Scratch DJ June 09, 2004