Warning: This move is recommended for masters ONLY!
The roadside assistance is a sexual move that needs a bit of preperation and good timeing to pull off. There are some guidlines to follow first.
1.You must be driving on Rt. 80
2.You must be driving in a 4-door sedan with your GirlFriend.
3.You must do this between the hours of 3:30pm - 9:00pm
4.You must pop your tire and manage not to hit any cars and pull off to the shoulder, unscathed.
After you pull off the the shoulder you call AAA (Triple-A). A few moments after you hang up the phone, you start to have sex with you GirlFriend. Once you and your girlfriend are about to climax (have to climax at the same time) you yell "TRIPLE A". At that exact moment the AAA guy has to come up and knock on the window and must reply "Yes?"
If you manage to pull this move off, you will be a god among men.
"So yeah, I was driving on 80 today, and I saw someone doing the roadside assistance, But then that damn cop had to ruin my fun by pulling me over for being stopped on the highway, trying to jack off to the couple."
|2.||Double Barrel Fun-Time|
A new and innovative sexual position between two homosexual males. The male with the smaller genitalia will insert his penis (or barrel) into the other gay's penis, thereby arousing and pleasuring both partners.
"Let's get you home so we can have some crazy double barrel fun-time"
Gayboy#1: "I can't wait to shove my tiny pecker inside your huge willy"
Gayboy#2: "Double Barrel Funtime is super sexy fun, even for the person getting his boner penetrated!"
Not letting a man get a boner before sex,
so you put a flaccid penis into a woman's vagina,
then while it is in the vagina,
the man gets a boner so the woman feels it
getting harder and going up the whole time.
friend: So how was your rendezvous with him last night?
woman to friend: Excellent! We totally did the Reverse Gooseneck last night!
friend: is that fun?
Woman: Hell yeah! I felt it go up the whole time!
|4.||Cinnamon Roll Job|
A cinnamon roll job is when a man masturbates, putting his dick in the center of a cinnamon roll, and intensely humps or moves the cinnamon roll to and from his body to masturbate. The fun of a cinnamon roll job is that you can't tell if the white stuff is icing or jizz! It's a lot more fun if the cinnamon roll is warm, and soft, like a vajayjay!
Dude, I'm so bored.
Go give yourself a cinnamon roll job! The fun is not knowing if the white stuff is jizz or icing!
Okay! Sounds awesome!
When you put your favorite kind of hot sauce on your wiener and you get a blow-job. Named because although it adds so much more feeling, the heat makes both people cry.
"Ever since my boyfriend made me do a surprise Crying Dragon, our sex life has been so spiced up in more ways than one.
|6.||how to lose your virginity|
*sex is like math: you add the bed, subtract the clothes, divide the legs and pray you dont multiply!* this is dedicaded 2 my JT, i love my baby, in the bed, ohhh i doooomore...
Laydees & genitals ;] introducing the fast & simple way 2 pop dat cherry. How to LOSE YOUR VIRGINITY!!! This guide is for ppl who no longer want 2 b the virgin they r. Here r the steps:( this is the pleasure guide, u will need a man) Remember, u don't want the guy 2 noe it's your first time, even though he may find out, u always gotta seem experienced, and lively otherwise he'll dump u flat & go jackin off some asian bitch.Let the guy take off yur clothes if u r shy, he'll noe wht 2 do if he suggests 2 'do it' W/e u do don't take off his clothes, yet.
First, lick your fingers and start slowly rubbing the lips of your pussy. Keep on rubbing your own pussy, and then he will start to do the same. Rub around to make sure you are fully wet. When fully wet, find the clit, take his hand and start rubbing together firmly in a slow manner. Try different motions, go soft, then HARD. Okay, so this might not be that fun for the guy, but this is just the beggining, this is just 2 get your juices flowing, and that wild girl inside of you 2 *click*. Okay, so it seems slow right now eh? Then in a rapid momment, push him 2 the bed, and start cupping his grinal area. At this momment i bet u a hundred bucks he would take his shirt and pants off for you. I hope u've been teasing him and still wearing that bra of yours. Oka...
the method of wanking, unlike the ordinary way, it is where the hand is in the shape of a claw and it moves up and down which can give pleasure.
person 1: im gonna have a wank
person 2: have a carey claw instead, its better