Football means different things in different places. In the United States of America, it refers to American Football, which involves 11 padded players (the offense) attempting to bring an oblong ball into the oppenents endzone, whereas the other 11 players (the defense) try to stop this from happening while trying to cause a turnover (interception, recovered fumble) or make the offense go 3 and out; as 4 downs are given to the offense to advance 10 yards. If they do so, they are given 4 fresh downs. To see more, search American Football or click on the link provided.

Football elsewhere refers to what I and other Americans know as soccer; which involves 11 players on each team attempting to kick a checkered sphere into the opponents goal. Hands can only be used by the goalie, who can not leave the rectangle in front of their goal; other players must move the ball by kicking it or heading it. See other definitions on this page or search soccer for further explanation.

I love to play American Football, whether it is casually with friends or competitively with my school team. I however do not like competitive soccer, though I do like playing casually with friends. It is a matter of prefence, and will everyone stop bickering about which one is better? It is opinion, nothing else.
Fan: Football kicks soccer's f&*%ing ass! Soccer eats hairy balls.

Fan: Football kicks American football's f#$%ing ass! American football eats hairy balls.

Reasonable Person: Oh shut up, both of you idiots. They're both good sports.
by soccer, football, whatever April 14, 2010
Nickname for the president's briefcase that houses a laptop that is rumored to have strategic command capability.

Believed to be in the charge of the federal courier service and not the secret service.
The Football is handcuffed to the courier's wrist.
by Seriphimarchangel November 19, 2008
A term referring to several different team sports around the world. Most games known as "football" actually involve the use of the hands more frequently than the feet, such as American Football, Canadian Football, Gaelic Football, and Australian Rules Football.

The term also refers to Association Football, a game in which players primarily use their feet (although they also make extensive use of the head, chest, and knees while goalkeepers are also permitted to use their hands). Most of the English-speaking world (the USA, Canada, Australia, South Africa, New Zealand, Ireland to an extent, etc.) refers to this game as "soccer" to differentiate it from their indigenous football games, although ethnocentric and culturally insular English people insist that "football" is the only acceptable term for the sport.
Although most English-speaking people from different cultures who live on multiple continents know "football" as a game that involves picking a ball up and running with it, English people themselves know that nothing short of literal translation will do when naming sports. If it's called "football", then it should be a sport where only feet are used. Except for the countless times in soccer games when the players use their heads, chests, knees, shoulders, and sometimes even their hands, of course.
by Hubert Cumberdale Jr. October 02, 2012
A bunch of beefy, burly men beating the crap out of each other just to score a point
Tom: What's football?
Peyton: A bunch of beefy, burly men beating the crap out of each other just to score a point.
Tom: Sounds exciting.
by obamachange August 23, 2013
*Not to be confused with American Football.
Football, often called 'The Beautiful Game', is invented by the English and is the most popular sport worldwide. The general objective of the game is to score more goals in their goal than the other team. It has two teams, each with eleven players separated into 4 positions:

*Goalkeeper

*Defence

*Midfield

*Attack

It comprises of two goals on either side of the pitch, with each team owning their own half. The goal that they want to shoot in is on the opposite side to their half.
Each team starts on one side of the pitch, which changes in the second half, and consequently so does the goal they want to shoot in.The game lasts for about 90 minutes (not including extra time) split into two 45 minute halfs, separated by a 10-15 minute 'half time' period.
American: Hey, d'ya wanna play some soccer?

English: What, you mean Football?

American: No, it's called soccer.

English: NO, it's called Football! We invented it!

American: IT'S SOCCER!

Rest of World: It's called Football, OK? Now just play!
by eden1023 June 10, 2011
Nuclear retardation diesease where foot grows out of testi satchel
My uncle went to chernobyl and came back with a bad case of foot ball.
by General Asswipe July 06, 2006
A sport played mostly by egotistic assholes.
Man look at how buff I am because of football.
by Carl_Doee May 25, 2013
Is a game where players get paid for simulating injuries and best rolls on the floor.
It's also known as the bank, as the players get paid millions of dollars, although the world is in crisis and people who work their ass off every day of their life, don't even earn enough money to survive.
A: will you watch football today?
B: naah I'm tired of watching the professional "fallersontheground"

A: hey they offered Ronaldo almost a milliard worth contract to switch teams! His pinky is worth my whole life salary.
B: and all he does is change his earrings, do some tricks, laugh to the cameras, act arrogant and occasionally give money to poor (although he never really faced that) for people to think that he has a good soul and deserves to cost more money than there even is on earth.

football ronaldo money ball fake rich poor million
by grumpyme February 21, 2013

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