Not cool. Not even somewhat, no matter how hard you try to convince yourself and other people. A place where people go to die amongst other dead old people. Stay away at all costs. If the heat and humidity doesn't get you, the annoying people will.
is always telling me how great Florida is despite it being a total shithole
. Who's he trying to fool
that she should move to Florida because it has the nicest weather. He must really like melting skin and pop-sweats in winter.
The godforsaken Sunshine State renowned for weather and beaches. Florida is noteworthy for having no discernible season changes. Well-known for its subpar education system, Florida is home to Florida State University
, a party school known for its football team and its acceptance of anyone who has a pulse and can spell his or her own name correctly. The population here is an amalgam of inhabitants from elsewhere; if you wish to find a retired New Yorker, go to any one of Boca Raton's 5,000 retirement communities; if you want to find a Latino/Hispanic
/person whose first language is Spanish, turn around. Florida is a geographic anomaly in that the farther north you travel, the more Southern it seems (and sounds like), and the farther south you go, the more it seems like Cuba (as evidenced by the Little Havana area of Miami
). Still, Florida, as a whole, is without an easily recognizable dialect. All place names here are either of Spanish (Punta Gorda, Boca Ciega) or Native American (Tallahassee, Econolockhatchee River) origin, or contain the word "orange" in them. Florida decor has inexplicably come to mean "a seafoam green and pink couch with a watercolor pelican painting." Floridians are not known for good taste; also missing are driving skills, especially in the frequent rain, and voting know-how.
-"Florida's a nice place to visit, but I wouldn't want to live here."
-"Bah! Go back to New York, you snowbird
Florida: The state for the newly-wed and the nearly-dead.
AKA: God's waiting room.
A state with two seasons... Summer and January 14th.
I went to Florida for Christmas break... It felt like I was there for SPRING Break.
The only state in the country where the further north you go, the further south you get. Also a lovely place to retire.
If I retire rich, I will probably live in or around Miami, but if I retire poor, I'll probably retire up North near the panhandle, in a trailor, with my dog Rufus. someone kill me
Homer simpson: We can't go to Florida... thats America's wang! *points at the dick-like state of Florida*
The only state in the U.S. where the number of natural disasters in a year is more than the number of smart politicians.
Hurricanes or morons? People of Florida have to pick their poison, sometimes even both.
The most disposable "rapper" in the history of music.
Hey Bobby, what's a seven letter word for human excrement?