| 15. | Lake Jackson Symphony Orchestra | ||
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When horny denizens exit their plant, they drop by the local turkey shoot to carry out their manly duties, corn-holing any bird's cloaca. The resulting cacophany is recorded by Deutch Gramaphone and marketed as LJSO. Man, when Rigger Monkey came home, it was Lake Jackson Symphony Orchestra for 20 minutes!!!
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| 16. | xanga | ||
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The "trendiest" xanga -- an online journal must have the following information:
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1) A list of every little thing that you did, including trips to the bathroom, shower, and anything personal that you should want the world to know. 2) If you went out, you must list every single person that you went out with. It's only a superb entry if you can list everyone. INCLUDING people you saw, people you met, people you wanted to meet and people you wanted to see. 3) In your status bar, you must "shoutout" to ALL the people you know. OR - Write a mushy lovey dovey poem, saying i miss you, i love you, i want you, why cant i have you, i cant live without you, i am so desperate for some ass, you know..that kinda stuff.. 4) a) To add some 'flavor' to the site, you must talk in incomprehensible ghetto slang that only you and your homies would understand. oh yea. almost forgot, you have to ToGgLe YoUr LeTtErS LiKe tHiS, oThErWiSe YoUr XaNgA eNtRy WiLl n0t Be CoMpLeTe!! OR b) You may choose to write babyish, cute, sweet, you know write in words that makes reading take longer than it should. 5) At the end of each entry you must force your xanga friends to 'drop you some epills' or 'holla baqq!' (whatever that means). 6) At the entrance and exit of your xanga page you MUST have consistant pop ups reminding people to eprop you, miss you, threatning to kill people if they dont eprop you, curse out those who tries to right click. 7) Remember to curse a lot, but ONLY... |
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| 17. | rojo | ||
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Rojo is neither the official spring fashion for 2005 nor the communism of clothing. Rojo is, by definition, deez nutz. That's right, rojo equals my balls. Not your mama's, not your papa's, mine. Therefore, anyone who subscribes to the theory of rojo subscribes to my hairy nutsack. "Guys! Rojo is so in this season! I can't wait to get in on the trend!"
Pants drop. Balls exit. This is rojo at its prime. |
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| 18. | shit | ||
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1. One of the most popular swear/cuss/curse words/profanities
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2. another word Feces. Poop. Dookie. Scheisse. Poo Poo. Brownies. The Shit List: The Ghost Shit The kind where you feel shit come out, see shit on the toilet paper, but there's no shit in the bowl. The Clean Shit The kind where you feel shit come out, see shit in the bowl, but there's no shit on the toilet paper. The Wet Shit You wipe your ass fifty times and it still feels unwiped. So you end up putting toilet paper between your ass and your underwear so you don't ruin them with those dreadful skid marks. The Second Wave Shit This shit happens when you've finished, your pants are up to your knees, and you suddenly realize you have to shit some more. The Brain Hemorrahage Through Your Nose Shit Also known as "Pop a Vein in Your Forehead Shit". You have to strain so much to get it out that you turn purple and practically have a stroke. The Corn Shit No explanation necessary. The Lincoln Log Shit The kind of shit that's so enormous you're afraid to flush it down without first breaking it up into little pieces with the toilet brush. The Nororius Drinker Shit The kind of shit you have the morning after a long night of drinking. It's most noticeable trait is the tread mark left on the bottom of the toilet bowl after you flush. The "Gee, I Really Wish I Could Shit" Shit The kind where you want to shit, but even after straining your guts out, all you can do is ... |
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| 19. | Houdini shit | ||
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The actual definition of a Houdini shit is a turd that contains enough negative buoyancy to drop to the bottom of the toilet and glide it's way down far enough into the toilet's exit portal that it appears to have mysteriously disappeared or make you question whether or not you even crapped to begin with. It often times shares the characteristics of a Jesus Shit, which is the term used for turds that leave no residue on the anus. Boy, today's Ziggy cartoon was pretty funny. Oh well...I'm done wiping so I guess it's time to stand up, flush and get back to wor- OH MY GOD! HOUDINI SHIT!
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| 20. | Burda | ||
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1. To fake a sick day at work to avoid a deadline.
2. To leave a party early without excuse or telling anyone. 3. To pike I'm thinking of pulling a Burda to get out of tomorrow's meeting.
Dude, you totally pulled a Burda on Friday. |
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| 21. | crappetite | ||
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1. A desire to drop a fecalith deposit in a nearby toilet.
2. An insatiable craving to let fecal matter exit the body. 3. Wanting to take a dump. I walked into the Porta-Potty and saw that the crap had crested the hole in which it sat, whence seeing it I lost my crappetite and proceeded to leave.
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