1-A big douche

2-someone who many think should have sexual intercourse with a porcupine

3-someone who, when around women, is slapped often

4-Synonym for Kim Jung Il, leader of North Korea

Douchbaggius Maximus is a person, and we use this term loosely who has transcended mere mortal ways of being a complete douche bag. This is the guy who is serial monogamist, Ei dating girls for extended periods of time before fucking them over leaving them or generally exposing his position as a complete asshole. This is worse than Douche-bah-Promiscuous, the most common sup species of the douche bag, for two reasons. One, he reeks much more emotional havoc on women, and two Because you must know him (generally a he, but there are females of this subspecies, or breed).

Identifying features of this species include, dating a girl for a month a year or more, occasionally parading them around their friends, mixed with keeping them in another State. After a few months there will be a period of cheating which often but does not always include, the male receiving oral sex from a random girl at a party, then receiving it in random places in a big city in Maryland, engaging in sexual acts during high school, in stair wells with girls they claim to detest on moral grounds, refusing to speak to people they have been in association with for the better part of a decade, because they are, sexual immoral, when in fact the friend is much more sexual reserved loyal and monogamist that any species of Douchbaggius Maximus could ever be.

A bagel fucker is an individual who works at the local bagel shop, and is very proud of it. He acts as if he a serious important job that could not be done by an underpaid illegal immigrant, when in fact he works at one of many generic bagel shops, much like any Deli bagel, or grocery store employee, his skills are such that he can easily be replaces if he leaves, as his replacement will take one to two weeks to train.

This person looks super serious when giving you your bagel, is upset if you do not become a regular costumer, and always eats, even on the days he is not working, at his place of employment, willingly going back behind the counter with out pay.

He may also engage in the act of making a doughy Vagina, like Flesh light and having sex with it. Alternatively he may fashion a dildo out of flatbread and allow the manger to ritualistically sodomize him with it, with the intent of becoming the grand master of dough.

1-A person who has ascertained a position of such high douchebaggery that he takes douchbaginess to a new level to totally blow you away with the inability to respond or act for some time.

The act of being or pertaining to the actions of a douchebag