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The supreme icon of male obsolescence in today's society. Once a woman gets a taste of the right one, she never puts up with male bullshit again. Hard when we want it, long as we like it, goes as long as we do, provides instant fantasy support so we can imagine ourselves being fucked HARD AND LONG by hot-and-sexy anybody we want to be by instead of that dumb twat swaggering around thinking he's the center of our life and about to get dumped, no wet spot, no HIV, no other woman, no other man, no backtalk, no bullshit, and when you're done with it you can dump it in a drawer and it's out of your face - no fucking phone calls, last minute date requests or sassing. To be gotten at the sex toy shop near you, and the good ones are about $100-150. Small price to pay for peace of mind, yo. GIRL, GET THAT DILDO TODAY AND WATCH YOUR SON OF A BITCH SOON TO BE EX BOYFRIEND START TO SWEAT WITH REAL FEAR.

They pretend to like it, but they don't really. Just think, a thick slab of latex gets your pussy more than they ever will. I bought mine and am NEVER looking back. And right here let's kill the myth we ladies choose dildos because "no one else would fuck us". WTF? You're on crack, you male bitches. I turn you down all the time. WE USE DILDOS BECAUSE THEY'RE BETTER THAN YOU AND BRING LESS BULLSHIT. GOSPEL TRUTH. GET SCHOOLED.
"What the fuck do I need YOU for? I've got A DILDO that makes you look like the soft bitch you are. Get the fuck out of my house, you saggy balled twat. Technology has made your ass REDUNDANT."
by HSFATTACK September 18, 2006

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Soft and offensive. Just like you.

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an erotic toy used by women or gay men for sexual stimulation
He's a real supa. He has a large collection of dildos in his bedroom.
by GuidoPosse69 January 31, 2005

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The Urban Dictionary T-Shirt

Soft and offensive. Just like you.

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a sex toy that varies in size, shape, and color that can be used by the female to pleasure herself when she cannot get it from a person.
My dildo is hot pink and has 3 different settings!
by pimpette January 11, 2005

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The Urban Dictionary T-Shirt

Soft and offensive. Just like you.

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The Urban Dictionary T-Shirt

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Someone who's just embarassed themselves.
'I've forgotten how to tie my shoelaces!'
'You fucking dildo.'
by Force Majeure December 24, 2008

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The Urban Dictionary T-Shirt

Soft and offensive. Just like you.

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The Urban Dictionary T-Shirt

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Direct In-Put Limited-Duty Officer: an individual commissioned into a branch of the military typically without having traditional ROTC training. A DILDO is typically selected to fill a specific job, with little or no opportunity for lateral movement. Most of these jobs could easily be filled by civilians, but a commission is bestowed to provide a visual level of authority to junior military officers and enlisted.
A typical example are the officer instructors at both the enlisted and officer Naval Nuclear Power Schools in Goose Creek, SC. Individuals apply for DILDO commissions out of college and, if selected, are sent through Officer Candidate School. At completion are award a commission in the US Navy as an ensign. These officers then become permanent members of the instructor staff at the Naval Nuclear Power Training Command (NNPTC).
by navy bob September 23, 2007

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The Urban Dictionary Mug

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The Urban Dictionary T-Shirt

Soft and offensive. Just like you.

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The Urban Dictionary T-Shirt

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can't do anything by themselves
"can u help me plz" "Damn it you can't do anything yourself you fucking dildo"
by mazza07 January 18, 2007

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The Urban Dictionary Mug

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The Urban Dictionary T-Shirt

Soft and offensive. Just like you.

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The Urban Dictionary T-Shirt

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One very lucky peice of plastic
dude1:man i never get any.
dude2:i know what your sayin man,sometimes i wish i was a dildo.
by basementdweller1 September 15, 2007

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Lotsa space for your liquids.

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The Urban Dictionary Mug

Your favorite word on a white mug.

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The Urban Dictionary Mug

One side has the word, one side has the definition. Microwave and dishwasher safe. Lotsa space for your liquids.

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The Urban Dictionary T-Shirt

Soft and offensive. Just like you.

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The Urban Dictionary T-Shirt

Smooth, soft, slim fit American Apparel shirt. Custom printed. 100% fine jersey cotton, except for heather grey (90% cotton).

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a plastic shlong
since my mom is too fat to get laid, she uses a dildo to 'excite' herself which is kept under the bed
by dr. chazzy chaz February 28, 2004

The Urban Dictionary Mug

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Lotsa space for your liquids.

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The Urban Dictionary Mug

Your favorite word on a white mug.

Create a mug

The Urban Dictionary Mug

One side has the word, one side has the definition. Microwave and dishwasher safe. Lotsa space for your liquids.

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The Urban Dictionary T-Shirt

Soft and offensive. Just like you.

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The Urban Dictionary T-Shirt

Smooth, soft, slim fit American Apparel shirt. Custom printed. 100% fine jersey cotton, except for heather grey (90% cotton).

Buy the t-shirt