Imagine sitting inside of a box, Its a totaly transparent box, You can see a whole world outside of you with all the pleasures it can offer (you know like having fun with friends, playing games, listening to your favorite music, etc) Heres the catch, that box your inside of... Its bolted to the ground. Your trapped inside with no way of ever getting out.
To me, That is what depression feels like
I feel like a rat in a trap, Always wanting to break free of my restraints and run, But the metal only digs deeper the more I struggle.
Jake abused drugs, alcohol, and himself to numb his depression and forget his problems.
1~sadness, tearfulness, crying, frequently showing pervasive sadness by wearing black clothes, writing poetry with morbid themes, or having a preoccupation with music that has nihilistic themes. Also, crying for no apparent reason.
2~hopelessness feeling that life is not worth living or worth the effort to even maintain their appearance or hygiene. They may believe that a negative situation will never change and be pessimistic about their future.
3~less interest in activities; or not enjoying previously favorite activities dropping out of clubs, sports, and other activities. Not much seems fun anymore.
4~persistent boredom; low energy Lack of motivation and lowered energy level is reflected by missed classes or not going to school. A drop in grade averages can be equated with loss of concentration and slowed thinking.
5~social isolation, poor communication lacking connection with friends and family. avoiding family gatherings and events. Teens who used to spend a lot of time with friends may now spend most of their time alone and without interests. not sharing feelings with others, believing that you are alone in the world and no one is listening to you or even cares about you.
6~low self esteem and guilt assuming blame for negative events or circumstances. you may feel like a failure and have negative views about their competence and self-worth. you feel as if you are not "good enough."
7~extreme sensitivity to rejection or failure believing that you are unworthy, becoming even more depressed with every supposed rejection or lack of success.
8~increased irritability, anger, or hostility often irritable, taking out most of the anger on your family. you may attack others by being critical, sarcastic, or abusive. you may feel u must reject ur family before their family rejects them.
9~difficulty with relationships you may suddenly have no interest in maintaining friendships. you'll stop calling and visiting their friends. u also may have lost a loved one or had a bad relationship with ur bf/gf
10~frequent complaints of physical illnesses, such as headaches and stomachaches complaining about lightheadedness or dizziness, being nauseous, and back pain. Other common complaints include headaches, stomachaches, vomiting, and menstrual problems.
11~frequent absences from school or bad performance in school causing trouble at home or at school. Because u may not always seem sad, parents and teachers may not realize that the behavior problem is a sign of depression.
12~poor concentration having trouble concentrating on schoolwork, following a conversation, or even watching television.
13~a major change in eating and/or sleeping patterns Sleep disturbance may show up as all-night television watching, having a hard time getting up for school, or sleeping during the day. Loss of appetite may become anorexia or bulimia. Eating too much may result in weight gain and obesity.
14~talk of or efforts to run away from home Running away is usually a cry for help. This may be the first time the parents realize that their child has a problem and needs help.
15~thoughts or expressions of suicide or self-destructive behavior saying u want to be dead or talk about suicide.
16~alcohol and Drug Abuse using alcohal or other drugs as a way to feel better.
17~self-injury having difficulty talking about their feelings may show their emotional tension, physical discomfort, pain and low self-esteem with self-injurious behaviors, such as cutting.