Skip to main content

Dan Marino

the 27th PICK OF THE 1983 draft, since there were only 28 teams back then, dipshit. his defenses were consistently near the bottom of the league and never truly had a great running back. when asked to give up the ball to the running game, he did out of desire to win a championship, only to find that the players jimmy johnson picked at that position were duds. in most experts opinion, he is at least on a par with any quarterback in nfl history. probably a victim of his own statistics, because idiots like don shula figure "if we just rely on danny to pass teh ball all game, we're bound to win a super bowl eventually". peers of his like john elway, had the fortune of having a coach with a brain, who realizes that you will not win superbowls unless you have a balanced attack on offense and a solid defense.
idiots would call marino selfish, but i wonder how far those teams would have gone relying on teh running game and defense they didn't have
Dan Marino by Michael Scholl April 4, 2005
Dan Marino mug front
Get the Dan Marino mug.
See more merch

Dan Marino

Master of the Pig-skin. Suck on that Peyton.
Dan Marino threw downfield. Pass Complete. Touchdown.
Dan Marino by Johnny Pseudonym January 19, 2005

Dan Marino

Miami Dolphins quarterback for 17 seasons. Without a doubt the best quarterback in history. Posessed the quickest release known to man. Would read defenses like a hawk and would consistantly have phenominal seasons. A true champion and an incredible competitor.
Mr. Marino is definitely superior to all quarterbacks to have played the game including the over-rated Joe Montana, which by the way had a running game and a defense to help him get his Super Bowl rings.
Dan Marino by Isabel April 19, 2005

Dan Marino

he was quarterback for the Miami Dolphins from 1983-1999. he was the best pure passer in the game. he's arguably the greatest quarterback of all time. he owns every major quarterback record in the NFL, and is at least in the top 10 of most of the other QB records. he only went to the superbowl once and lost in 1984. however, for 17 seasons he never complained or asked to be traded despite the fact that his team had no other playmaker other than him, no running game, and no defense. he's second in career wins with 147 (john elway had 148).
if dan marino was on the 49ers instead of joe montana, he would have won every superbowl in the 80s.

if dan marino had terrell davis in the backfield like john elway did, there'd be no reason to have an NFL season in the 90s.

don't let anyone say marino wasn't a clutch performer. no QB in nfl history has more game-winning or game-tying drives coming in the last 2 minutes than number 13.
Dan Marino by paki December 17, 2004

The Dan Marino 

So you're fucking a girl doggy style and you act like her cooch is getting dry so you say "Hold up baby, let me get some lube". Except you don't get lube; you get a fucking NFL sized football with a Miami Dolphins logo on it. She's just moaning and waiting for the KY and you set up that pigskin laces out. Then you yell "MARINOOOOO!!!" and kick that ball for her two holes. You have a friend waiting in the closet who jumps out and gives the field goal sign yelling "Laces out Dan!!". If it's in her pussy (and sticks): 1 point, and if it's in her ass (and sticks): 3 points. In addition, if you carry the girl out to a large body of salt water, with the football stuck in either hole, then it's 6 points and a mermaid will jump out of the ocean/sea/brackish swamp with arms up and yell "TOUCHDOWN!!!" as you spike that ho into the water.
Casey- "Dude, that girl at your place last night looked pretty washed up this morning"

Justin- "Yeah man. Well, you can't blame her- I pulled The Dan Marino on that bitch. And... I went for the touchdown."
The Dan Marino by ASHEVILLE BEAST October 13, 2009

A Dan Marino 

When you take a dump inside of a urinal, named after the erstwhile Miami Dolphins Quarterback.
"Yeah man, every single stall was full and I was rushing to my meeting so I just had to drop the trousers and pull a Dan Marino."

Dan Marino Challenge

As you are pooping, before the poop leaves your butthole you grab your penis and use it as a firehose and cut the poop in half #ri #mg #scripps
I did the Dan Marino Challenge the last time I took a dump, it was insane