Young urban hipster that rides a bicycle. These special people wear skin tight pants with some punk belt with their ass crack hanging out, pant leg rolled up and Chuck Taylor All Stars shoes on and some sort of skin tight t-shirt and stupid assed necklace like a dog chain around their neck. They've usually modified a good bicycle and turned it into an abomination by taking the brakes off, handlebars straight and chopped, and fixed gears. They think they're gods gift to bicycling (which sucks anyway) and think they rule the road. They're more like deer on the road, very unpredictable, and swerve in and out of traffic in rush hour, use the sidewalks and generally cry large alligator tears when they get run down... Cycletards are the worst of the hipster douchebags on the planet.
What was that I just ran over? I think it might have been a cycletard, as I have black jeans wrapped around my axle now. Damn it.
by SeattleEvilDave October 17, 2009