Top Definition
n. A person who furiously beats the sausage while uncontrollably crying about how pathetic their life is and how no one will ever want them or love them or touch their insanely small penis.
"Goyney is a cry whacker."
"That kid is the ugliest bastard I have ever seen, he must be a cry whacker."
by Lunchbox April 26, 2005

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The Urban Dictionary T-Shirt

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n. a person who cries while masturbating, usually due to depression, or a girl not being interested in said cry whacker.
"He is a cry whacker. or "what a cry whacker."
by jeffy April 22, 2005

The Urban Dictionary Mug

Lotsa space for your liquids.

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The Urban Dictionary Mug

Lotsa space for your liquids.

Buy the mug

The Urban Dictionary Mug

Your favorite word on a white mug.

Create a mug

The Urban Dictionary Mug

One side has the word, one side has the definition. Microwave and dishwasher safe. Lotsa space for your liquids.

Buy the mug

The Urban Dictionary T-Shirt

Soft and offensive. Just like you.

Buy the t-shirt

The Urban Dictionary T-Shirt

Smooth, soft, slim fit American Apparel shirt. Custom printed. 100% fine jersey cotton, except for heather grey (90% cotton).

Buy the t-shirt