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1.
Possibly the most pointless hairstyle ever. It goes like this:
1. Pull up hair 'bare tight bled' so about 25% comes out and eyebrows are situated on top of head.
2. Hold in place with stupid hairband with things like cherries or dice pointlessly hanging off. Add ribbons and bells if necessary.
3. Unscrew lid of vat (minimum volume 25 litres) of hair gel/grease. Apply thickly and generously to not forgetting roots. Let dry until hair can be held up by gel alone without the pointlessly crap hairband.
OPTIONAL EXTRA!
If you missed little tufts of hair they can be curled up and glued onto forehead with aforementioned grease. V. attractive to any 'rood bwoy' wearing a Burberry (gaaah! Doom! Doom!) cap.

Must be painful. Worn mainly by common tarts and nedettes/she-neds.
No. Dont make me think about it. NOOOO!!!! NOT THE CROYDON FACELIFT!
by hermaphrodite June 05, 2004
337 93
 
2.
Type of hairstyle where garage loving council estate females pull they're hair up into a pony tail so tight it lifts their face.
She has a croydon facelift!
by Tim Huegdon June 17, 2003
192 93
 
3.
The effect achieved by a chavette by scraping all her hair up into a very tight ponytail on the back of her head, leaving facila expresssion somewhat inhibited. AKA pikey botox.
'A pram, a Kappa tracksuit, a screaming child, a few Iceland bags, a Croydon face lift - yes, this is a superb example of the archetypal chavette baby factory on legs.'
by The Moai April 19, 2005
61 72
 
4.
Derived from the actions of famous supermodel Kate Moss.

The action of scraping your hair back so tightly into a pony tail and as a result, lifting the face.
You know girl, i got me a Croydon Face lift!
by ChrissytheBlack July 25, 2011
3 57