| 9. | creationism | ||
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1. The idea that all the Ph.D. scientists on the planet, who actually spent 10-30 years of their lives getting an education in science and making real discoveries, are intellectually inferior and biased in comparison to 14- to 18-year-old impressionable christian youths and sexually frustrated right-wingers who barely graduated from high school who easily fall for hoaxes which are assumed to be "evidence" for bible literalism and against the rest of science.
2. A conspiracy theory which suggests that all the scientists on the planet are corroborating on a scheme to turn the public away from their belief in God via the theory of evolution (not only atheist scientists, but Christian, Muslim, Jewish and Hindu scientists are in on this anti-God scheme; go figure). Of course, like all conspiracy theories, you will be accused of being naive by the paranoid masses if you happen to use your brain and actually think about how it's not only impossible for thousands of people to be in on a lie without a single one of them having the scruples to come forward and expose said lie, but also impossible for snakes to talk. 1. Creationist: "Did you know Darwin recanted evolution on his deathbed? That proves evolution is wrong and creationism is true!"
Someone who doesn't have his head up his own ass: "That claim was refuted over 100 years ago. And you wonder why scientists don't take you morons seriously?" 2. Creationist: "What? You mean you DON'T believe in fire-breathing dragons and a global flood which has no evidence? You mean you actually believe what scientists say about science and not my pastor? What's wrong with you? Well don't worry, I'll pray for you." |
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| 1. | creationism | ||
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The idea that two centuries of consistent scientific data by thousands of logical minds is wrong and that Earth and life were not created by a causal chain of events but by an infinitely knowing, loving and powerful--yet seemingly indecisive and possibly bipolar--deity in less than a week. Its strongest argument is its compelling assertion that if you don't believe in it, you'll go to Hell with everyone Jerry Falwell finds personally distasteful and you'll all roast for eternity while demons gangrape you with white-hot tridents. Jack Chick said science is just as evil as Catholics and Jews, and that's why I believe in creationism.
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| 2. | creationism | ||
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The result of Christians' insane refusal to accept that their religious doctrines are wrong. Creationism can only be believed by people with absolutely no understanding of science or history.
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| 3. | creationism | ||
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The belief that ALL lifeforms on earth magically appeared in, literally, a couple of days. Did you see the movie creationism? It has the wildest FX but, geez! Totally unrealistic story! A waste of money if you ask me!
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| 4. | creationism | ||
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The belief that you know more about science than an actual scientist. I think creationism is a fact and evolution is JUST A THEORY. Kind of like how the Sears tower is JUST a little bigger than a phone booth.
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| 5. | creationism | ||
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Denial, foolishness, brainwashing, etc. Creationism Dialogue
Creationist A: Evolution is only a theory! Creationist B: Yay! Let's go kill some heretics! Pat Robertson: Assassination is fun! George W Bush: Can I say 'Crusade' again? Creationism |
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| 6. | Creationism | ||
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The idea that God created everything and we were never apes clonking each other with clubs and fossils are the result of the deadly "flood" known from the story of "Noah's Ark".
It's basically all B.S. Pastor: "God created everything, face it, he is the most powerful creature on Earth. Creationism is fact."
Scientist: "Have you proof of such happenings? Have you found God?" Pastor: "The Bible is enough proof." Scientist: "Anyone can write facts down and have people believe in them. Just look at how Santa came to be." Pastor: "You have a point. I have wasted countless years believing the ridiculous. I see the light now." |
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| 7. | creationism | ||
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Lies, fairytales, bullshit. Person A: I believe in creationism.
Person B: You are a retard. |
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