husband: um,Barbara sweetie, what exactly do you think you are doing? Is Kyle your new craigshook?
wife: no, Adrian. well, yes he is a craigs-hook, since I picked him up on Craigslist and he asked me to decougar him.
husband (adressing the teenager): so you are a mommy-grabber, you bastard? If so, you don't deserve a a craigs-hook with my wife, but a bloody left hook. And you don't deserve to be my wife's craigshook either, since I will now kick you out of my house for ever.
James: I am no longer a virgin
George: lol. What did you do to pop it? Cuz I will kill you if I you popped my ex-girlfriend Christina's cherry. Or did you date-rape some carnival floozie, like Homer Simpson's brother?
James: Um, roflmao, no. I did none of the junk you have enumerated so far. FYI George, i had a craigs-hook.
George: Wow!. So I guess you really were that desperate to lose your virginity that you even abandoned all moral pretexts and turned to Craigslist. Interesting.