Contrary to modern belief a country bumpkin can, in fact, spell and they are also articulate members of society.
Also, there ARE female members of this discriminated against group. The females are usually hotter than any other female from any other race/group and once aquiring the male that they chose for life never lose him because they are simply the best at what they every possible sense of the phrase. :-)
Average dude that managed to get a bumpkin female: My woman is the best that I ever had or could ever hope to have.
Average dude stuck with average girl: My chick is so fucking superficial. She can't cook, clean, articulate or put out decent sex.
Average dude that managed to get a bumpkin female: Sucks to be you man....I got to go get some from my girl. Later.
by countrybumkin April 15, 2005
big bellied, long haired, untrimmed bearded, fat-so that works at a factory 1/2 the year, laid off the rest of the time. Spends his evenings eating dinner on a TV tray watching TV in the front room. His unemployed wife's 3 kids, with 3 different daddies, eating dinner with their hands in the kitchen. Leaving the dirty dishes to pile up in the sink until they run out, or until she has time to rinse them off. Has many rusty vehicles surrounding the house, but only one runs.
My ex-husband is a country bumpkin.
by zookeeper January 14, 2005
A member of society who writes long, ramblimg, and disjointed thoughts. Puns never intended.
Country Bumpkin is my newest BFF and I love chatting with her in my spare time.
by M Jane Wagon July 10, 2008
A rude thing to call a farmer, a bumpkin usually spends all day on a deck, widdling away on a stick, and anyone who passes by he points a rifal at and tells to get off his property.
Farmer Harter is such a country bumpkin.
by isisj October 18, 2004
When a man receives oral sex while moving his bowels in an outhouse
I gave billyjoe a country bumpkin in wisconsin.
by Jonah Weiss August 19, 2009
- someone usually from the midwest, whom lives in a small town but does not live on a farm and do all that labor. usually on the poorer side.. but have a very posative view on life.

- a kid whom has grown up in a small town of the midwest , whom moves away for a bit, but always comes back to the home town. usually for the familiarity of it all
-umm myself and others from the small iowa town we live in
by jugga_lizzle November 19, 2004
Getting head from a baby cow while taking a shit in an out-house
When his aunty sent Jim-Bob to collect eggs he would sneek a country bumpkin in the out-house behind the barn. Bessa would complain but he liked it when he got his jimmy jostled.
by Aneta November 06, 2007

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