A rubber device worn on the dick to prevent the cum going in the pussy. If the girl knows your name, where you live, can track you down, etc then wear a condom. If she doesn't, go rawdog.
Girl: Shit, i thought you were wearing a condom?!

Guy: LOL, i guess i forgot! Good luck with that. (bolts out of the door and makes his escape)
by GRU-Sniper March 08, 2007
where ur condom or u will be a fuckin wanker
where ur condom or u will be a fuckin da
by chris d 100 June 22, 2005
A latex, polyurethane, or natural sheepskin oblong barrier placed over the penis for eliminating most chance of pregnancy for human males who can:

1. Actually fit into the damned things without losing all bloodflow and causing permanent damage.
2. Do not experience an extremely vast, sexually debilitating loss of sensitivity due to the thickness of the material and the lack of circulation.

Condoms, among those with penises longer than 190mm or wider than 52mm, are sometimes likened to wrapping a standard rubber band around one's wrist sixteen times and then trying to play a musical instrument, such as a piano or guitar, using that hand, for an hour. Generally, in such a scenario, one's hand will experience first pressure, followed by throbbing pain, succeeded by a piercing pain, ending finally in numb limpness and likely permanent or long-lasting damage to nerve endings or blood vessels.

Such individuals generally protest that while condoms are a brilliant invention, they need to be made to accomodate more human proportions, as they are available in two basic sizes: short and fat, or long and narrow. In all latex or polyurethane cases, the elastic band at the base of the condom is always 2" (0.06mm), which is the root of the problem yet does not vary with the width of the shaft and head areas of the condom sizes.

The only reasonably sized condoms in these cases are the natural condoms, which are unfortunately made of sheep intestine, and smell like it. Yet this type proves an option preferrable over the absurd designs of the vast repertoire of other condom types.
'Jeanette is pregnant now.'
'What? Kevin, didn't you wear a condom?'
'Yeah, it was actually the first time we ever used a condom in our seven years of having sex, but I stayed inside her for hours and didn't notice until it was too late, because I was wearing the condom.'
'Wow. Should have stuck with withdrawal, huh?'
'Yeah, definitely.'
by Kyle Lees April 09, 2006
Balloon that gets placed over the weiner
i put a condom on then fucked my dog
by Fredsasadasdasd January 23, 2009
A rubber shopping bag used when having sex with a girl that is really loose/been around the block & a feel more.
by Visual September 05, 2003
A rubber device worn on the dick to prevent the cum going in the pussy. If the girl knows who you are, where you live, can track you down, etc then wear a condom. If she doesn't, go rawdog.
Unsuspecting girl: Shit, i thought you were wearing a condom?!

Guy: LOL, i guess i forgot! Good luck with that. (bolts out of the door and makes his escape)
by GRU Sniper March 02, 2007
Something matt leinart dosnt no how to use
That sound u hear when ur puttin ur kid in its car seat...Click-clack

Don't be silly wrap ur willy

Condoms are cheaper then diapers
by nick hoffmann August 30, 2006

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