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1.
While having sexual relations with a woman, you pull your penis out during said relations and smack her on the nose violently with it while shouting "Cock Suey!" then reinsert and repeat if necessary.
Well I'd just returned from teaching the Harvard MBA. My wife, Scarlett Johansson and I were entertaining our good friend Professor Stephen Hawking, who had come to ask my advice on his latest theory concerning the evolution of the universe. He and I were in the library, browsing through my most recent translation of early Etruscan hymns into middle Flemish, when he said, and I'll never forget this, he said "While I was having sex the other night I gave the hooker a Cock Suey and you should try it too!"

by Peter Squeal February 16, 2008
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