22
A boring-ass place where all you do is listen to some robed asswipe yap about some bullshit from the bible. You also get to sing gay gospel songs. It usually lasts 2 hours, but some churches can go up to 4-7 hours.
Kid: Man, my mom just made me go to church. it sucked ass.

Friend: Man that's gay. There goes two hours of your life wasted.

Kid: Two? Try five.

Friend: Fuuuuuuucccck..................
by Wasabimoto April 28, 2007
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23
Church unfortunatly has been twisted by christians and ruined what it was meant to be like, the same goes for christians and how they have ruined christianity, if you read the bible(new testament) you will see how it is supposed to be done and be truly amazed because its awesome.
Man in white gown with candle is not church its just boring. People getting healed and being happy and excited thats what church should be and can be because jesus is alive.
by JoelB April 02, 2006
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24
1:where you tell your parents your going to be for the next few hours, when in reality,youll be at your boyfriends house,fucking him
"hey mom? im going to church in an hour. have you seen my red dress? the one with the slit up the side?
by oogie boogie jen August 26, 2003
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25
That thing with the stuff where they tell all those lies
(1)on church they told me that Jesus can walk on water, and I told them that Chuck Norris can walk on Jesus
by CHANCLA 316 September 21, 2007
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26
An increasingly prevalent and defining aspect of the church in America(Churchus Americanus), is its symbiotic relationship with the gas station or convenience store. Scientists have been unable to ascertain exactly how they benefit each other, but the Church and the Gas Station/Convenience Store are frequently found near each other. This relationship has vexed scientists for the last 50 years, when it was first observed. They are not mutually dependent, but they seem to prosper more when together, and Churches independent of Gas Stations and 7/11 are becoming endangered. 7/11 tends to bond more exclusively with liberal denomination churches. AM/PM is far more versatile but works well with the more traditional and conservative churches.
Ex. 1

"By god's will, in this mighty Church, there will be pound cake to dip in orange soda at communion."
by therapod November 27, 2012
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27
A place to Worship God our father. Gods house. Where all his people gather to speak of his beautiful word.
In church The pastor Spoke of Jesus the Son of God.
by Tiffany D June 21, 2005
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28
A place where crazy, stupid people go to listen to some old child molester talk about myths found in a fiction book called the bible.
Wow, your weird. You actually go to church?
by yourmom666- December 21, 2011
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