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167.
The Chav, commonly mistaken for a human being.
It is actually a sub species that is thought to have strong links to neanderthilic culture. Indeed, the basic desires for sex, loud things, fighting and fast things are all common between the two.

There are two main breeds of chav. The female, more cunning, of the species sometimes called a Chavette. Scientific name being Chavettus Femiminine. The current technical term for such an entity, is Slut. Normally known to lose their "V"'s or Virginity before reaching full sexual maturity, they ensure that the chav race does not dye out by producing many offspring each year. They seem to have a natural affinity towards Nike Air Max and Burberry check. Both normally fake, this is assumed to be a more modern attempt at tribal markings. In this way, the Chav tribes can recognise each other in the frequent fights. They do infact posess some intelligence in the form of breeding rapidly and young so as to abuse the benefits system for as long as possible. Common drinks of the Chavette include Lambrini and other cheap alcoholic beverages.

The other type of Chav to be looked at here is the Male breed of chav. These are by far the most common of the species and are the "Hunter Gatherer" types of each tribe.
Their Hunting being the art of scouting out shops in the area and then Gathering the items for no material cost. Shoplifting could almost be considered a holy activity of the chav. The clothing is much the same to the Chav female, and often accompanied by an ear ring and cap at a jaunty angle. The drinks are the same but they often drink Stella Artois beer, being both cheap and effective at stirring up drunken brawls.

Chav culture, if it can be called that, mostly involves the consumption of alcohol and ciggarettes, and then fighting in drug and booze fuelled rampages that can last for hours. A hunt involves a large group of chav males and females going out and preying on people who are often on their lonesome. Most commonly, Moshers, Emos, Goths and other such social groups who unlike chavs, have developed braincells. Not always applicable in the case of the Emos.

Recently having received internet from whatever council provides them with a roof over their heads. Chavs have found their way onto the elusive internet and discovered social networking websites. Commonly frequented ones are Piczo, MySpace and Bebo. Piczo and Bebo have become almost fully "Chavenised" (Can be compared to Galvanised, the chav forms a protective layer over what was once good and pure.) Some have even discovered websites which give them HTML codes for their MySpace. This was previously unheard of, as Chav's are unable to comprehend their first language. Yet alone use a programming language!

Chavs also seem to have their own language which is documented worldwide on various internet websites. This is normally monosyllabic, although exceptions to occur. "Wanker" is two syllables yet they seem to have an adequate knowledge of its usage. It is suspected it is a variation on Neanderthilic culture, creating words where necessary to ensure only they can understand their language.

All in all, the Chav is to be viewed as a social menace and their stature within the country not very high. It is suspected that soon the Hunting Ban in england shall be amended to permit the killing of Chavs to rid us of this social menace. For the meantimes, gather up your holy water and Silver Crosses. Or if you are realistic, grab a handful of pennies, throw them in the other direction, the Chav's will run to the money in hope of a warm dinner.
Chav - Council House And Violent
by Artix May 30, 2008
 
337.
a faking hooligan with only the word 'emo' in their vocabulary.
indie walks past some chavs...

chav 1: emo
indie: *ignores*
chav 2: emo
indie: your originality becomes you.
chav 1: EMO
indie: i have never met someone who's had their favourite appendage so far up their shallow arse that they've forgotten their own gender *walks away*
chav 1&2: emo...
by Loz von Banshee August 26, 2007
 
338.
Steretypically, the chav is possibly the most imbecilic, arrogant, mindless, violent and stupid person around. They gather in large numbers and hurl insults to anyone who does not follow thier 'fashion'. Which consists mainly of fake gld jewelry, Burberry, tracksuits and other sportswear. Also, a peaked cap is a must have all-season accessory.
-A girl all in black walks past a group of chavs-
Chav:Oy, you, you a fuckin' dirty greb or somefin'?
-Girl walks of faster-
-CHavs start to follow-
Eventually, the girl gets sick of the, and will find some of her friends, who sort out the chavs
by Nayaha! April 29, 2007
 
339.
Also known as Charv

Chavs tend to swagger, throw out those West/East side hand gestures, and act rude. They are usually antisocial, but very confident in themselves. Chavs don't usually play sports because they are known to be lazy. They enjoy happy slapping and being obstructive to society. Most Chavs take part in underage drinking, smoking, drug use, and sex. Slang is definitely an important part of being a chav. Instead of 'isn't it' they say 'innit' and they replace the 'th' sound with the 'd' sound.

What they wear:
(male)
-tracksuit bottoms tucked into socks
-puffy jackets
-fake Burberry (FAKE)
-trainers
-gold/silver chains (FAKE)
-earrings
-Sports caps or Burberry caps

(female)
-tracksuits (pink or baby blue)
-trainers
-Burberry (FAKE)
-gold/silver chains (FAKE)
-large hoop or dangle earrings
-tight pony tail
-thickly applied makeup
(Innocent person walks down street minding their own business.)
Chav: "What you lookin' at?"
by Bree! April 07, 2007
 
340.
The chav is normally a class of people below working class, i.e classless if you like. They have no money of their own as they get all of this from the government.. how nice of them. Getting payed to do nothing, and incentive to have many many offspring - as they get even more money for this. And, free housing.

The chav father is typically 12 - 17 years of age , towards their early 20's they will have roughly 10 chilren of whom all have different mothers.

The same applies to the chav mother except she will have 10 children of different fathers! this is how they are planning to take over the world - OVERBREEDING.

All chavs have to wear "uniform" if they want to be a part of the gang, if they do not conform to this "cult like" demands of the leaders they will be extradited until they learn to do as all others do. Typically, they all wear imitation sports clothes, a favourite look is to tuck ones socks into ones trousers, possibly to intimidate passers by.

One of the favourite habits of the chav is to hang around shopping centres near argos and "maccy'dees" as they like to call it. They feel that they are very scary, often calling out swear words and insults that would not impress three yr olds. "oi spekkie" , "haha t**t you've got a tie on" . yet when confronted they usually run away, if not they just cowar!

lastly they have built their own language from base english, most words are less than 2 sylables long so as not to confuse each other. not that they would know what longer words meant anyway as most drop out of school at 11.
by sunshine1984 April 05, 2007
 
341.
either a fit young lad hanging round in bus shelters, parks or churchyards usually wearing a tracksuit with his bottoms tucked into his socks or a old lazy fart that lives on benifits or a young slut!!
o o im a chav il top ya motor!!
by b12 March 12, 2007
 
342.
A frighteningly unintelligent (AND POOR) creature with no morals or fashion sense. For more information see:White TrashandScratter.
CHAV: Oi! wot u lukin at! I iz well 'ard i iz mate. I'll fukin merk ya! Ya fukin gay goff, innit.
CIVILIZED PERSON: Pardon? I'm afraid i don't speak Working class scrounger language. Can you speak any English?
CHAV: YOU FUKIN STARTIN! I'LL FUKIN BATTER YA! YA CHEEKY GREB!
CIVILIZED PERSON: Please go back to your council estate you pathetic piece of POOR WHITE TRASH.
CHAV: YOU FUKIN WOT!?
(Luckily, by this time the police arrive and arrest the chav for breaching the conditions of his Anti Social Behavioural Order.)
by Andy_The_Righteous_One August 13, 2006
 
343.
A humanoid drone with no intentions in life other than to go to prison, steal things from old women, and beat 4 year olds. In this episode of "Exploring Vermin", we dissect the Chav's existance.

1: Morals

A Chav is motivated not by its own brain(whether or not it has one is unknown) but rather the actions of its pack(see 2), with some of its more aggresive actions fuelled by the beatings it was given whenever it made a single noise for the first 5 years of its life. It generally aims to:

-piss off every living thing around it
-make itself look like a complete arse
-chug enough monster and red bull to make an ant be able to cross the world twice in around half an hour

2: Interactions of its kind

Chavs hunt in a small pack of 5-6 males with one or two chavettes, usually for extra dickhead motivation. The group of arseholes will then try to look hard in front of the female(s). The Chav will attack anything nearby, including small children, brick walls and postboxes, usually ending in an ASBO.

3: Sustenance

Chavs will consume anything as long as it is not healthy in any way. Chavettes notably treat vegetables as poison.

4: Friends

-none found-

5: Enemies

-cannot display, number exceeds 99999999.

6: Reproduction

Chavs and chavettes will reproduce once every few weeks, ers, a scientifically proven fact.

7: Intelligence

Ha, that's a good joke.

8: Conclusion

Both the chav and chavette need to become extinct for humanity to remain profitable.
Louis: yo blad what u bin sayin??
Kev: nothin mate juss bin wiv chantelle
Gazza: aaay fams wot ya doin
Louis: blud, wot u doin yeh?
Gazza: startin fam? STARTIN?
Louis: an whaat blud? i bang you mum
*Gazza walks off, muttering "u succh a chav blud"*
by David Attenbourough September 01, 2012