The melody: originally from Balkan countries like Turkey,Greece,Serbia and Bulgaria, or stolen from famous or not so famous pop and RnB songs. The most important is the appearance of gipsy rhythm there.
The lyrics: made for creatures with intelligence coefficient less than 100.
Easly understandable when you are affected by rakia,mastika,menta or another home-made alcohol.
The lyrics are based on the deepest human aspirations like sex, easy money, expensive cars,etc.
The singers: for women is obligatory previous plastic operation to increase breast, large hair and Halloween make up. Thats why they're sometimes thought drag-queens.
The performances are characterized by shiny whore’s clothes, strange dances called ‘kiuchek’ (it consists of shake breasts and ass) and bad performed play-back.
The fans: in the case of Bulgaria it's the 80% of the population. They are usually 'bitovi alkoholici', horny virgins, unsatisfied wives, village ‘gangstas’, etc. Young girls between 13 and 20 years usually try to look like their idols, while male individuals usually wear white socks, blue 'Boomerang' flip-flops, sport trousers 'Adibas' made in Turkey, silk shirt and leather coat.
The chalga music is very suitable for special cases like 'selskiq sbor', 'Trifon zarezan', weddings, baptisms,etc. Nowdays it's used not only for these events, but for every uncivilized friends meeting.
Black sea, it's very good,
A hole in the sea,
Chakalaka de (african influence)
Black sea, aide stiga beee
Very shity music made by Bulgarian low-inteligent musiciants adicted to low-quality alcohol and preformed by guipsies and retarded whors(most often blond).The lyrics are cheesy and doesn't ring any bells...at all
(translation of a chalga lyr)
Oh bathroom,oh joy
the village bathroom is the greatest joy!
Chalga is a bulgarian style, first meant to be only limited to the music but then grown to a whole movement in the social life of Bulgaria. The main traits of the calga are the following:
- lack of inteligence
- peasant origin (not really necessary)
- whore type dress style (for women) and "big necklaces, cheap sport's wear, white socks and black shoes" (for men)
Well known names from the CHALGA industry are: KONDIO CIGANINA TUP, MARA OTVARIACHKATA, GERGANA the SILICONE and many others.
In fact, the last years the CHALGA replaced the porno industry, forbidden in Bulgaria. The women who would like to become a CHALGA singer should go through several tests of their sexual capacities. Just after being sleeping with 2 producers, 1 CEO, 2 high level criminals, 7 low level criminals, 4 shopassistants (generally in butcher's shop) and 12 neigbours they are titled "APPRENTICE CHALGA SINGER"
In general to become a CHALGA SINGER there is also an "lack of intelligence test" with those 3 questions:
2. What is the first name of Todor Jivkoff
3. Name one river starting with "D" and finishing with "unav"
If you have more than one correct answer you are expeled for good from the CHALGA society.
"Hey, CHALGAR smotan" - excuse me, sir, can I attract you attention to the following matter?
"Zaebi q taq CHALGARKA" - we'd better not to discuss any further this woman with behaviour like a whore
Imagine a horse. Imagine the heap of horse-shits.
Are you with me?
Now, imagine the worm inside the horse-shits which is eating them (intestinal worm). Now, imagine the shits of that worm.
So, that bloody heap of smelly worm shits is chalga.
In other words, chalga is extracted shit from all dirt in the World.
God bless all who are not in Bulgaria and those that don’t know what is this chalga. Fucking chalga is everywhere in Bulgaria.
These red tomatoes
who has 'em baby shaked off
Who has you baby lied
Who has yo baby fucked up
Not particularly sophisticated music by (often) not particularly sophisticated composers, writers, and performers, mostly targeted at not particularly sophisticated listeners with 1/2" foreheads and no necks (insurance business folks, cops, cheap alcohol addicts, etc.)
Features cheesy lyrics and primitive melody, bearing superficial resemblance to traditional Bulgarian folk music.
From Turkish "chalga" meaning popular music (or sort of - corrections welcome.)
Ooooh Tiger Tiger
Do you have the dough
Do you have the dou-U-u-u-Uu-u-ugh
Pretty chicks for you
A ganre in bulgarian music loosely based on bulgarian, greek and turkish folk music with some pop elements thrown in. The music and lyrics are usually of very low quallity. The performers are usually women that dress like whores as mentioned in the previous definition. However most of them are very good singers and work really hard, giving live performances 3-5 times a week.
(translated lyrics example)
...and don't say words of love to me,
I most love the wisper of money...
Bulgarian deformed and corrupted kinda music
. Good for nothing except making you stupid, retarded and having sort of fun when totaly wasted !
The rocks are falling,
falling from the sky !
Green, green when all my money are green, green !
Greek and Turkish music which is stolen by low-intelligent Bulgarian musicians
is my neighbour bai Ivan
he's old-known in the PD (police department)
with his thefts from the TKZS (the communist system of division of the agricultural land)
Bai Ivan is very wild
whenever he steals he's happy
he lacks conscience and morality
even the mayor was robbed by him!
7 times he has stolen
the pumps of the dam (!!!:D)
(duet "Apollon" - Bai Ivan)