A member of a clueless freshwater species known as the river kayaker who ventures out of his element and into the lineup thinking he or she can actually surf, with no concern for the hazard posed to real surfers by a huge uncontrollable boat and paddle. Obviously afraid of salt water, as indicated by presence of nose plug, helmet, and life vest.
"Hey, bra, what's up with that buttsurfer crowdin' the lineup? If he likes sitting on his ass so much, shouldn't he stay in his cubicle?"
"Dude, I know, he totally ran me over when he got caught inside on that big set!"