Justin: "I was drinking too much last night and my butt calipers caused me to bring home a heffer."
Chris: "That's unfortunate, you should probably chalk this one up to a slump buster"
Samer: "I saw this girl at the club last night and was so excited when she fit perfectly within my butt calipers. Unfortunately it turns out she was like sixty years old!"
Nick: "You still had sex with her didn't you?"
Samer: "You're focusing on all the wrong details."