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Sir-Brags-A-Lot 

A person who assumes that he is superior to everyone else but is horribly, horribly wrong. He has a cocky attitude about him that tends to make most people angry, however, for some unknown reason he tends to enjoy it even more if someone does get angry at him. Typically he is the last one to get the jokes that are directed at him even though they are plainly obvious.

He plans to go to a university nearby for fear if he was to go to somewhere like MIT he might actually meet someone there who he would consider to be more intelligent than him. Heaven forbid that happen. Then he would have one less thing to brag about and a Sir-Brags-A-Lot must ALWAYS brag. They'll even brag about stupid things that most people wouldn't be proud of - like having a huge mouth. They love nothing more than being better than other people or showing others up. Even if they make a thirty-five on their ACT (which is a nearly perfect score) with their last breath they would still brag saying, "if I would've gotten any less than a thirty I would have been upset," even if all their friends made less than a thirty just to be a jerk.

Sir-Brags-A-Lots typically have little to no common sense even though they are what most people would call "book smart," for example: a Sir-Brags-A-Lot would try to lift the lid off of a vacuum sealed decicator (which needs slid off not lifted off), after being told that this would not work and then ask why it wouldn't open. They are also very bad in classes such as English.

A Sir-Brags-A-Lot is also thought to have a secret affair going on between him and his computer. Just as a warning, a Sir-Brags-A-Lot and his computer are a scary thing to behold. Watch out for those sticky cords! NEVER. EVER. Approach him while he is whispering sweet nothings to his darling. He might attack. Seriously. It is rumored that he has been considering leaving his beloved for a newer, younger model but no one is sure.

Signs of a Sir-Brags-A-Lot:

+ Arrogant, cocky attitude that no one likes.
+ Constant bragging.
+ Talks to people like they’re little kids, or inferior.
+ Often thought to be having an affair with their computer.
+ Seems to have a need to show people up.
+ Typically is slow when it comes to jokes.
+ Has little to no common sense but is what some people call “book smart.”
+ Likes to be a jerk.
+ Tends to be somewhat hypocritical and ironic.

If you meet someone who is a Sir-Brags-A-Lot you are doomed to forever here them brag about how much prettier, smarter, and oh-so-much-better they are than you even though they aren’t.
Sir-Brags-A-Lot: "If I would've made any less than a thirty on the ACT I would've been so mad!"

Ordinary Kid: "Stop bragging jackass."

Sir-Brags-A-Lot: "You're just jealous."

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Sir-Brags-A-Lot: "I was the only person in my math class who made an A. If anyone would've made higher than me I would've been really angry."

Ordinary Kid: "Does it look like I give a fuck? Stop bragging."
Sir-Brags-A-Lot by Lawlroxazors December 9, 2008
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tony two bags 

Trea Turner's favorite player, Anthony Rendon, also known as the best 3rd baseman in baseball. Plays for the best team in the MLB, the Washington Nationals.
And Tony Two Bags, living up to his name, has hit yet another double! Bring us your backpack emojis!
tony two bags by Raynman9 June 4, 2018

cats van bags

A phrase used mainly by the artist slug of atmosphere that means to leave a city on tour. Cats mean people, van means the van they're traveling in, bags mean the bags of the people leaving. Its basically just a quick way to call someone up and say its time to leave.
J-Bird calling Murs in the morning: "Yo Murs, Cats Van Bags at 9:30 yo"
Murs: "Fuck!"

Bragavond 

Any person who is given to large bouts of hyperbole and/or exaggeration. Claims regarding facets of his or her life will sometimes seem plausible until combined with the multitude of other experiences and/or possessions he or she claims to have had.
Jill: "Apparently he claims to be a good friend of Matt Shadows of Avenged Sevenfold."
Jack: "Even though he's 13 years Shadows' senior and has absolutely nothing in common with him?"
Jill: "Yup."
Jack: "What a total bragavond."
Bragavond by Grufflekins September 20, 2011

Shame Brag 

For when you have done something so shameful but can't stop telling people about it that it almost seems like you're bragging.
"Ok this may be a bit of a shame brag but last night I got so drunk I lost my wallet, phone, ipod, friends, self-respect and woke up in a bin with no shoes on."

OR

"I felt so creepy when I made out with that teenager last night."
"No need to shame brag about that to everyone."
Shame Brag by fin32 August 31, 2013
used in the U.K. to call dibbs, to claim first choice, by saying bagsie you are saying it is yours because you are the first to claim it.
bagsie shotgun (i will sit in the front passenger seat)
bagsie in goal (i will play as goalkeeper)
bagsie yer iphone (i know blackberry is better but if that shit is goin fer free..)
bagsie by nickthetwat May 8, 2010

bragbooking 

An annoying Facebook status update in which an insecure person consistantly boasts or brags about ones life, husband, children, animals, turd size, ect. in order to impress others and convince themselves of their fantasy life because they suck in the real world.
EXAMPLE: "Look at Buffy's status, she's a bragbooking fool! Didn't her momma teach her anything?"
BUFFY: My life is PERFECT, I have the BEST husband in the world and the smartest kids who do no wrong! I love you Mack!!!
bragbooking by JesandHeather February 5, 2010