When you're at your straight friend's house pounding back a few beers and your friend gets up to go to the bathroom. You take your friend's nonempty beer bottle and forcibly insert it into your anus. Using your now gaping asshole, you rub your anus all over his couch cushions, pranking your friend.
Lance got up to use the toilet so i bottleanus'd his couch
by Alec J Biello August 26, 2011