Top Definition
A lazy blowjob that eventually turns into a handjob.

(Blow + Hand) + Job = BlandJob

bland - /blænd/ (adjective):
lacking in special interest, liveliness, individuality, etc.; insipid; dull
That prostitute only gave me a blandjob! I want my money back.
by X13 November 12, 2006

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The act of getting a blowjob while recieving a handjob at the same time is known as a blandjob...but dont let the name fool you... blandjobs are without a doubt the best part of blowjob week
Steven: so u get laid last night?
Martyn: nah dude, its blowjob week.
Steven: ouch!
Martyn: yo stfu bitch! My ho gave (referring to his cock) Iron Man a blandjob.....now that takes co-ordination.
Steven: wtf's a blandjob?
Martyn: (sighs)fuckin idiot.
by Martyn with a 'y' bitches May 01, 2008

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When agirl gives you a blow job and a hand job simultaneously.
"I won't give you a blow job but I'll give you a bland job."
by Lauren is the shit March 15, 2008

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The act of giving a hand-heavy blowjob that results in boredom.
Bro she went down on me last night, but it was totally lame... all hand, a total blandjob.

I thought I was going to get some quality head but this chick relied on her hand the whole time--goddamn blandjob.

This girl I met at a bar looked like the type that enjoys giving some head. Needless to say I was surprised to get such a blandjob. I could have stayed home, saved the drink money, and wanked it myself.
by Horrice McCuthery July 20, 2009

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A blowjob that ends in a handjob instead of ending by cumming in the partners mouth.
I thought I was in for a hell of a blowjob but she pulled back and it ended up being a blandjob.
by Darkling Penguin February 16, 2008

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When a face is drawn on the index finger and thumb and the motion resembles the opening and closing of a mouth and creates the appearance of a hand-face giving a blowjob.
"Man that blandjob my girlfriend gave me was really awesome last night~!"
by JJ_McJ May 08, 2008

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