Birthdays mean different things to men and women.

Men - A day when you go out to a bar and have your friends buy you drinks. If you have a girlfriend she'll probably put out, if not then picking up some chick at the bar is a high priority. You are now 1 year older and can still pick up young girls, congratulations you've aged with sophistication. The older you are the more likely these young girls will believe that you've got money to take care of them. It's important to remember not to get attached to these young girls. You don't want to end up married do you? Compare your hair loss to the previous year, is the Rogaine working? Probably not.

Women - A day when you go out to a bar and have your friends buy you drinks. If you have a boyfriend he'll probably go down on you, if not then it's important to spend a large portion of the day thinking about why you don't have a boyfriend and if you'll ever get married. Sure Tom was an alcoholic who beat you on daily occasions, but you don't want to end up alone do you? When out with your friends it's important to remember what age you really are compared to five year spread you've been lying to people about. You're not turning 33, you're turning 29. There seems to be less guys looking in your general direction at the bar this year compared to last year's birthday, time to contemplate botox. Compare your amount of cellulite to last year's amount. Are those pilate workouts helping? Probably not.
Man - "It's my birthday so lets go out, get drunk and pick up chicks. We'll work up at it down at the local titty bar first, then at the local shit hole of a bar later. I'll wear my hat."

Woman - "It's my birthday so lets go out, get drunk and bad mouth men cause I'm turning 29 ... again. I'll wear my push up bra."
by Diseased Fetus November 17, 2005

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Another word for period.
"Dude, why are you so pissed?"
"Its my freakin birthday!"
by stephmey July 10, 2008

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The day a legend was born.
I wouldn't be here if I never had a birthday.
by Wannashare April 25, 2016

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One day in year, when people are not being a douche to you.
Teacher: Allright, I won't bother you today, cuz it's your birthday
Student: Thanks
Teacher: Tomorrow, I'm gonna start ripping on you
by mshd94 November 29, 2011

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The day some one was born
Today's your Birthday!
by dillyboo April 05, 2016

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A day that I I arrived at school at EXACTLY 7:00am and D'anne Kigler forgot to wear as kermit the frong shirt-but it still turned out well :)
Jan 19th 2011 is MY Birthday (like if we were born on the SAME day!)
by jecklynnn January 19, 2011

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The day I celebrate being one year older.
So many friends and family no longer have this small luxury that I feel blessed each and every year that I have another birthday.
by dragongirl702 January 16, 2009

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1. The day I thank my parents for
2. The day I buy my parents gifts instead of the traditional way
3. Pretty much just another day that is celebrates the pain your mother went through.
4. Otherwise, a day you celebrate that you havn't died in the last 365 days
1. Its my birthday, thanks dad and mom for giving my life
2. It doesn't make sense for my parents to give me gifts on my birthday.
3. Yay, my birthday, my mom went through so much pain today, lets celebrate
4. Yes, I did it again.
by lovemomndad November 08, 2009

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