when your friend doesn't believe you they ask you Bible? and if your telling the truth than you respond Bible. IT is simulating swearing on the Bible
you:hey i just boned stacey!

by slangterms999 May 12, 2015
A rather famous work of fiction that took over 1500 years to write and edit and still didn't turn out well.

Comparable to the modern-day Twilight series for its unnecessary length and number of sequels; poor quality of writing; overuse of sparkles; and annoyingly melodramatic characters (see: God; see: Bella).

Both works are also more renowned for their obnoxious fanbases than their artistic merit (or lack thereof).
"Man, some Jehovah's Witnesses came to my door again yesterday. They scare me a little, but I don't know how to tell them I don't want their Bible."
"Pfft, Jehovah's Witness. I can handle them with one hand tied behind my back. It's the Cult of Edward you gotta watch out for."
by atheismiscooler September 14, 2009
Bible which means,

"Basic Instructions Before Leaving Earth".

The bible is a that book tells about the old Testament and the new Testament. The old testament explains everything before Christ and the new testament explains about Christ.
God spoke to man the words of which to write in the bible.
by Julian Cesar Rosales Niles September 16, 2015
That book that gets people kicked out of the library for putting it in the fiction section.
Sorry I can't go to the library today, I got kicked out for putting the Bible into the fiction section.
by The Final Facade November 23, 2014
A book which, though it has no observable evidence and often contradicts itself, is thought by many to be 100% accurate.

It's as if Harry Potter were believed to be true, only this time, Harry gets revenge by controlling the masses with his unseen magical powers. Oh, yes, and we can never see Harry, either, until it's too late and we're 6 feet underground.
Me: The Bible makes no sense!
Christian: Have you read it?
Me: Yes! That's why I know it makes no sense!

Christian: Read the Bible. It tells you that God answers all prayers.
Atheist: I prayed. He didn't answer my prayer.
Christian: Trust that he knows which prayers to answer, if any.
Atheist: O_o *Circular logic, anyone?*
by IceMetalPunk November 10, 2008
An immense fictional literary collection of contradictions and conflicting messages that a religion called Christianity worships and uses to guide their lives.
Priest: The Bible is God's word. It must be taken literaly in ever sense.

MC Weezy: But Jesus's parable were told completely in metaphor and figurative language.

Priest: Ummmm.......
by MC Weezy July 10, 2008
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