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36.
A book which, though it has no observable evidence and often contradicts itself, is thought by many to be 100% accurate.

It's as if Harry Potter were believed to be true, only this time, Harry gets revenge by controlling the masses with his unseen magical powers. Oh, yes, and we can never see Harry, either, until it's too late and we're 6 feet underground.
Me: The Bible makes no sense!
Christian: Have you read it?
Me: Yes! That's why I know it makes no sense!

Christian: Read the Bible. It tells you that God answers all prayers.
Atheist: I prayed. He didn't answer my prayer.
Christian: Trust that he knows which prayers to answer, if any.
Atheist: O_o *Circular logic, anyone?*
by IceMetalPunk November 10, 2008
65 61
 
37.
a very poory-written, fallacious, self-contradictory book filled with falsehoods, absurdities, atrocities, and scientific impossibilities that was written by ignorant, primitive desert nomads from the Bronze Age
Can you believe that two billion members of the entire human species actually believe that the Bible is true? What's up with that?
by VenkmanMcFly May 17, 2013
11 8
 
38.
Many sheets of acid stacked on top of each other.
My friend just got a bible and he gave me a sheet from it!
by greyseraph December 03, 2006
246 243
 
39.
B.asic I.nstructions B.efore L.eaving E.arth
see the Love Guru to find Bible
by jedleard November 03, 2011
47 45
 
40.
a slang term used quite often by the Kardashian family, used instead of "i swear" or "i promise" or "im not joking"
Kourtney: OMG I saw Laura and Megan today!
Kim: Are you serious?!

Kourtney: Bible I saw them shopping at the mall together
by kardash4life January 01, 2011
33 31
 
41.
A highly popular fictitious literary work, almost as popular as the Twilight series.
Priest to congregants: We've noticed that this new Twilight book is turning out to be more popular than the Bible we've been teaching, so we've decided to teach Twilight instead.
Congregants: Fuck yeah!
by lifeinhd April 07, 2009
72 71
 
42.
Named for the Greek word "Biblios" ("Book") and considered the Holy Book by both Judaism and Christianity (which--at least at its inception--was considered a sect, branch, or spinoff of Judaism named "Messianic Judaism"--regardless of whether it was considered apostate, not-necessarily heretical but still heterodox, or legitimate/orthodox). The parts of the Bible that Normative (Mainstream, Non Messianic) Judaism and Messianic Judaism agree on are the books of Torah, Nevi'im, and Ketuvim--often called Tanakh. Where Judaism and Messianic Judaism divide is the point at which the New Testament (called "Hadashah" for "New" or "News") is eligible to be considered as part of Tanakh (written by some Messianic Jews as "TaNaKH" to include "Hadashah"; written as "TaNaKh" by some Non-Messianic Jews).
A respected or admired book that is not considered a holy book or even a religious text may irreverently or flippantly be called a, or even the, "bible" of its field, subject, or topic of study or exploration. For instance, one might call "The Communist Manifesto" a name such as "The bible of the Far Left," since Communists are very Leftist and subscribe orthodoxly to Karl Marx's and Frederich Engels' ideology as written in "Daas Manifesto".
by NCzarne2 June 14, 2013
0 0