| 8. | Bed Cred | ||
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Bed Cred is the reputation you gain among your peers for sexual prowess (or not, as the case may be). Bed cred is not gained only from bedroom sex, it can be gained from sex in a swimming pool, tennis court, or for extra points, bondage on ITV primetime, or other live tv shows. Interesting positions and/or use of equipment can get you extra cred, but size is the main factor - a 1 foot wonder will always beat a 1 inch wonder. Just remember, word has to get round, or no Bed Cred can be gained. Josh lost almost all his bed cred when he split up with Jane and she admitted he only had 3 inches
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| 9. | eggbert | ||
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Typically described as a full on male nerd who fully believes that the introduction and then subsequent removal of his sexual attentions from a woman's life can destroy her very existence. Confident in his extraordinary bedroom prowess, he can be characterised by his awkward dress sense, many female "just" friends, short stature and his extensive collection of PC gaming paraphenalia. Often balding, this man wears spectacles and declares himself an athiest. Is likely to have pronounced his love to many women, directly followed by a knowing look and the phrase "I'd only hurt you." This belief is based on real experience or an impressive intellectual architecture of movie plots sublimated over many years of saturday nights at home. Stock phrases include "Trust me, I'm a dick", "No, Modern Warfare on the PC is way better" and "Sure mum, I'll zip you up". Me: Oh god, its eggbert again.
Eggbert (Getting off back of Motorbike, behind driver): Bye mum! (Driver Waves, adjusts woolen coat and drives away) |
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| 10. | Kerkenides | ||
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Greek name for someone that is good looking, funny and very attractive to the opposite sex. They have a powerful "Alpha" personality and tend to be leaders. Gods in the bedroom and anywhere else for that matter. Charm is their strength, and they use it to get what they want, but no one minds because everyone likes them anyway. They are always looked up to by someone, even if the don't deserve it. His name is Kerkenides, therefore you will bow down to his prowess.
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| 11. | name | ||
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Something you add to urban dictionary with the definition of generally an attractive person that currently is making the writer of the new definition quite happy. Generally speaking the person is currently significant other, fuck buddy, or fiance of the writer. Definitions also include details that are sexual in nature quite often, probably due to the definition writer recently receiving great sex with the person they are now defining. Often speaks to a certain sexual prowess. These are examples of a defined name
Ashley : "Amazing, caring, smart, goal setter, high achiever, cares of others before herself, always willing to help out a friend. Great kisser and comfortable with who she is. Not very many enemies, everyone loves her. Alway see's the best in people at the beginning. Don't however get on her bad side, when you are there, you stay for a while. Family is important and looks to God for strength. Loyal to the one's she loves. Overall wonderful person" John : "An extraordinary man with the most lovely bedroom eyes, an absurdly seductive grin, and beautiful brown hair that always smells absolutely wonderful. He is always warm, and ticklish in a few places that make him twitch cutely. He has great legs, nice muscles, and large feet and hands. He is strong, handsome, sexy, and beautiful. He is intelligent, absolutely hilarious, loving, teasing, sweet, and thoughtful. He leads a very intense life and proves himself to be very hardy in doing so. He hides any hint of pain very well, and rarely opens up, but when he does he shows just how strong he really is. He is loved more than he'll ever realize. He is perfect in every way." -Real Urban Dictionary Definitions |
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| 12. | Jizcipline | ||
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jizcipline \jizz-uh-plin\ , noun, verb
1. The ability to maintain an enduring penile erection whilst performing sexual intercourse for a prolonged amount of time, regardless of the positioning or frequency of thrust 2. Something consistently practiced on Sting's tour bus and/or in his bedroom, likely for decades to come Louis, having no fear of a potential 'whiskey dick' scenario, met Jennifer at a night club, initiated coitus back at her place, and displayed such spectacular jizcipline that Jennifer's flat mate, Susie, was convinced both lovers had achieved a state of sexual nirvana.
Jizcipline is something I once possessed in my twenties, but time has been so cruel to these wrinkled prunes I doubt there is any chance for redemption, my dear. Yes, I shall call you a taxi post-haste. |
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| 13. | anaconda | ||
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a male, usually from southwestern australia, with a well known prowess in the bedroom. What an anaconda
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| 14. | madonna-whore complex | ||
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The seemingly conflicting desires that some (but certainly not all) men have for a woman who is experienced in the bedroom and unashamed of showing sexual prowess ("whore"), but at the same time a woman who is wholesome, clean and nuturing ("madonna"), particularly enough to not be branded a "slut".
This concept is due to having a large population of sexually frustrated people (both men AND women) who were raised to believe that sexual activity or just being sexy is a dirty and shameful act, and a society where both men and women have been led to believe that women have to either be complete prudes or totally promiscuous. "Dick is an ex-quarterback with a madonna-whore complex. Jane is an equally confused prude who needs to drink a quart of whisky to release her sexual inhibitions guiltlessly. They were made for each other."
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