A tax that is charged to a "friend" who is an asshole for one reason or another (such as cock blocking, never having money for bills, is literally an ass to you, or other such reason that will piss the Taxer off) or for debts owed. Asshole tax does not have to be of monetary value but needs only to be something that is worth something to you or the asshole.

For instance, you may take an ex-roomates computer as asshole tax since that asshole never paid bills, ate all the food, and banged your girlfriend.

If the taxee wishes to get the taxed item back, i.e. he wants his computer back, he may trade the taxer something of equal or greater value(value being worth something to you e.g. you don't need his computer, but you do need an iPod. You trade his iPod for his computer. The computer being worth more money, but the iPod being worth more to you.)

Be warned that severe assholes may try to recover taxed property through legal means, but don't worry, the law is on your side because everyone hates asshole.
Example 1
Tom: "Dude isn't that Steve's computer?"
Bob: "Yeah, but I consider it asshole tax"

Example 2
Steve: "Dude isn't that my computer?"
Bob: "Yeah, but I consider it asshole tax"
Steve: "Snap... I'll trade you my iPod for it."
Bob: "I could use an iPod... Deal."

Example 3
Steve: "Hey Bob, you going to the store?"
Bob: "Yeah"
Steve: "Here is a twenty... get me a drink and a pack of smokes."
*20 minutes later*
Bob: "Here is your drink and smokes."
Steve: "What about my change?"
Bob: "Asshole tax."
Steve: "Snap."

#asshole tax #asshole #tax #cockblock #debt #jacked
by djSyntek July 20, 2008
Top Definition
a tax added to one's subtotal of a bill, who generally acts like an asshole. this usually works because most assholes aren't willing to do their math.
"That guy was pissing me off, so I charged him asshole tax."
by jake l. August 13, 2005
A tax, mostly given to minors, who are having someone of legal age buy them alcohol, or cigarettes. any item they cannot personally purchase themselves
Hey Mike, you charged those kids an asshole tax for that alcohol? good job.
#asshole #tax #alcohol #minor #legal
by amaaanda September 07, 2007
a non-refundable fee assessed on debts owed to fed-up friends
you may owe me $80, but i want $100. why? you're late. that's your asshole tax.

see also _fight club_
by erinne June 11, 2005
Clothes, food/drinks, music, DVDs, books and/or other miscellaneous gear that is left behind for the taking after a friend or significant other unexpectedly disappears.
That's a cool bike! Where did you get it?
Oh, Zack left it at my house before he suddenly broke up with me.
Are you going to give it back?
No, I'm considering it Asshole Tax.

Hey! I like your hat!
Thanks! It was Gina's before she became a bat shit crazy bitch and stopped hanging out with me.
Oh sweet, so it's her Asshole Tax.
#bat shit crazy #asshole #significant other #friend #tax
by MoreAdventurous July 11, 2011
In the service industry: An employee or owner of a business uses all their discretionary power against a customer who is consistently an asshole. This is a hidden tax since people in service are rarely allowed to call assholes on their behavior.
Alice: You could have totally given that guy a discount.
Bob: He always ask for a discount.
Alice: Oh, well. I guess he just paid the asshole tax.

Carol: Why didn't you hold it for me.
Dave: I was too busy cleaning up after you.

Eve: Why won't you take that guys return.
Frank: He returns something every week, he needs to pay the asshole tax.
#retail #revenge #service #workers #lagniappe
by LaMarka January 30, 2010
The art of boosting the price of a service because of how incompetent and thoughtless the customer was.
...Little shit asked me to go do a job at 8 PM! I told him no, and he said "How about tomorrow, after lunch?". I accepted, though I still put a fifty dollar Asshole Tax on it.
#douche #asshole #fuck you tax #asshole tax #douchebag
by Dinjoralo April 11, 2011
The burden (financial and otherwise) imposed by living in a society in which assholes exist.
Needing locks on doors is a basic example. You step outside, shut the door, realize you locked yourself out and are stuck on the front steps in your bare feet in February. You are paying the asshole tax.

Or, at the airport, having to take off your shoes because someone once thought it was a good idea to try to blow up a plane with a shoe and someone else thought making everyone in their world take of their shoes would prevent that from ever happening again. The inconvenience is a small asshole tax. If you pick up a foot fungus from walking barefoot or sock-footed where thousands of others have, you're paying a bigger asshole tax.
#pita #pain in the ass #burden #fml #fuck my life
by Ygorl March 27, 2010
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