two metallic clamps, similar to a bear trap in nature, that clamp onto your rear end. this can cause a great deal of damage, and if untreated, will ravage your innerds
Joey: "so why is Mike in the hospital?"
Rick: "he got caught up in some ass-klamps"
Joey: *shakes head* "...poor guy. were they-"
Rick: "fully clamped? I'm afraid so"
Joey: "I can't believe this"