American Football is the act of trying to touch other men while running around in tights. For some reason it is called football (it is not played with the foot), but thats just because we're stupid americans. Football requires no stamina because individual plays last up to a grueling 15 seconds. Football players are people who just want to try to be bi-curious by taking showers with each other, and slapping each others asses. Most americans are obsessed with this sport, and on game days, resort to drunken blabbering and screaming random things. All around, the only good part of football is the super bowl half time show.

football is my least favorite sport but i still under stand it. lots of people ask me question like "who's the browns QB" or "whats a wide receiver do?" unfortunately i don't know these answers but i will prove my understanding in a simple equation

*Not to be confused with American Football.
Football, often called 'The Beautiful Game', is invented by the English and is the most popular sport worldwide. The general objective of the game is to score more goals in their goal than the other team. It has two teams, each with eleven players separated into 4 positions:

*Goalkeeper

*Defence

*Midfield

*Attack

It comprises of two goals on either side of the pitch, with each team owning their own half. The goal that they want to shoot in is on the opposite side to their half.
Each team starts on one side of the pitch, which changes in the second half, and consequently so does the goal they want to shoot in.The game lasts for about 90 minutes (not including extra time) split into two 45 minute halfs, separated by a 10-15 minute 'half time' period.

There is alot of americans (n sum auzzies) dissin MY country, saying that--
1-we are mongrels,
2.we never brush our teet,
3.we hate the irish,
4.we eat crumpets an scones an drink tea all day,
5.'can't go five minutes without diving into a bottle '.
6.we cant do sport despite inventing them all,
7.we are patriotic,
8.have stupid accents,
9.we are stuck up and claim that we hate america baecuase there men come over and shag all our women ..WTF.
10. automaticaly think were from london

all i can say in reply is

1.how can the americian call us mongreals when we fecking discovered there fecking country
2.we do brush our teeth that is why we dont need to spend £££ getting them whitened etc
3. we dont hate the irish there cool n have amazing FIT accents
4. we hardly ever eat scones n crumptets n so what if we drink tea..it beats sitting on fat asses eating double bugers chips and coke
5. we can go plenty a time with out a drink, u guys just dont no how to have fun. an at least we dont try an fix all our troubles by going on 'trisha' or 'the jeremy kyle show' an gettin cruddy counclling. n if 1 of us were n acholic at least we wouldnt sue the alchol comoany for getting us drunk. (think fat people suing maccds or smokers suing the ciggy company)
6.yes thankyou we did invent them all, an america can hardly critisize us for sport skills we are indeed much better then them at fotball (the most popular sport of all) and 2 u auzzie peeps out there im quite pso...

a sport that should be called football in America because it makes more sense. but just because Americans changed the name doesnt mean they arent good. i got news for ya! WE are good!! Didnt you see how good America did in the Confederations Cup? if you didnt they almost beat Brazil... in the finals! the score was 3-2 Brazil!!!

Anyway.... football (soccer) involves 2 teams of 11 players kicking the ball around on the field passing around trying to score on the goal. Soccer is very competitive and physical.

the best sport ever, and is best played by girls. yet sadly, it is becoming a victim of the times; with the coming of gear combo packs, and meatheads who cant take a punch. the new "hockey" is even said to be put second to american football by some CANADIANS! its just sad. but we will fight on, we will rid the sport of the adulterating wusses who say they can play (sydney crosby), and we will prevail over the ever present need for sleek and new, and go back to playing on ponds and lakes.