Smallish creature, possibly half-orc, full magic-user of Greek descent. Tendency to wear grey socks, medium-sized boxer shorts despite a density suggesting size large. Drives Volkswagens despite their known propensity to "shit the bed" after 90k miles. Wears 10% John Varvados, 90% Champion sweatshirts. Reacts positively with Northeastern art dealers and asthmatic basset hounds. Dubious in a fight. Mournful of the past. Prone to jealous rages. Fun at parties.
"Who dat driving like a ree-ree in dat black SAAB?"
"Bitch ain't no SAAB, dat's a VW, and dat clearly is a Zevitas."