Ah, that felt good. But really, all the girls out there writng awful definitions about men, may I just say that I am deeply offended. Trust me, we aren't ALL mysoginistic dipshits. And don't go calling me one, either. Read some of your own definitions about men, and you'll understand why writing that was necesary. Honestly, how can you expect people NOT to write stuff like what you're all complaining about if you're going to write stuff like that?
Ok, third section. Time get cracking. A woman is the female counterpart to a man. Like some men are woman hating shitheads that all other men hold in utmost contempt, some woman are men hating shitheads, with the diffirence being that their sexism is regarded with respect.
Other man: Um... screw you.
Shithead woman: Men should be erased from the surface of the planet!
Other woman: I totally respect that!
Note: I honestly don't give a damn what your gender is, so long as you aren't a total asshole. So don't think I'm sexist for saying that some woman are jerks, because that is true, just like some men are jerks.
Highly attracted to males of the species who are reasonable to look at, have jobs, are relatively kind, sometimes take out trash, and treat them like equals (not superiors, not inferiors -- equals.) Happily give blowjobs in return.
Prefer large dicks. Secretly laugh at guys who convince themselves that size doesn't matter.
Are paid seventy five cents for every dollar a man makes in the exact same job, same demographic, and same education level.
To those men who cannot procure them (because said men are too mean, stupid, sexist, ugly, and unaccomplished) they cause intense feelings of failure, hatred, prejudice, violence, and need to post on boards stereotyping all women with one narrow, negative definition. Said men then jack off alone.
When said beings reject such specimens of men or express an intelligent opinion, they are bitches.
When they don't put out, they are also bitches. When they do, they are sluts.
Women: "Ha ha, you're just mad because you can't get any pussy and you've got a tiny pecker."
John: "Dick, you're a sexist asshole *punches Dick.* I respect smart, strong women. I love my mama. I like to eat pussy. I've got a job; I don't make a lot, but I work hard and I'm ambitious. I've seen a treadmill before."
Women: "John, we all love you. Can we please suck your giant cock? Would you like to have an orgy with us? Please, oh please?"
John: "Yes, ladies, I would appreciate that. May I hold the door open for you?"
And no, we are not better because we have the children...what an idiotic thing to say, I'm tired of everyone using that. Not all women have children, you know.
Also, the group of humans that has received the most mistreatment throughout our world's history. Men and minority races have not received nearly as many ills as women have, and if you're a minority race AND a woman, then you've really felt the pain.
Bob- well she is stronger than anything in the universe.