One of several pieces of software from Microsoft:

1. Windows 1.0 was a graphical shell that allowed the user of an IBM PC to have several MS-DOS programs running at the same time, sharing the screen through viewports called "windows," hence the name. It was released after the first Apple Macintosh computer, and most users did not install it because it required too much memory. MS-DOS was an operating system that could only have one application open at any given time, and those applications could only access up to 640 kilobytes of RAM. Files stored by it had names consisting of eight characters, a dot, and three more characters, and certain characters, such as spaces, were not allowed. TEXTFILE.TXT was a typical DOS filename.

2. ~ 3.0 was a graphical shell that also had dynamic library support, a feature normally built into an operating system. Applications had to be written "for" ~, almost as if it was an operating system. It did things on behalf of applications, like an operating system. It was started from DOS as an application, and exiting ~ returned the user to DOS. Instead of folders, there were program groups, where programs had to be explicitly placed. Placement of a program in the Program Groups typically involved telling ~ the complete path to the program executable (ie, "C:\COREL\WP.EXE")

3. ~ 95 was a graphical shell that was booted directly by DOS, so that it appeared to be the entire operating system. It imitated the look and feel of a Macintosh. It was capable of running most ~ NT binaries, and it implemented pre-emptive multitasking, a feature commonly found in operating systems, and added support for "long filenames" (LFN), which allowed files to have Macintosh-like names. The "Restart in DOS mode" feature is equivalent to the "Exit Windows" feature in older versions of ~.

4. Windows NT ("New" Technology) is a real operating system that was written completely independantly of the line of graphical shells that are also called Windows. Microsoft hired the employees of DEC that designed VMS to work on ~ NT. Unlike ~ versions that were already on the market, ~ NT took full advantage of the Intel 386's 32-bit capabilities. Its design was so closely tied to the Intel 32-bit architecture that it could not be ported to a 64-bit platform easily.

The "New" technology in ~ was new only to Windows. Features new to NT, such as true multitasking and virtual memory, had been available in other operating systems since the 1970s and even before that.

Microsoft eventually began to market Windows NT as an alternative to UNIX, but they did so at the same time that Linux was becoming ever more popular as a UNIX replacement. Windows NT had many bugs of its own, and its superficial similarities to Windows 95 caused users to expect Windows 95 bugs to be present in Windows NT. Its Internet server offerings were notably inferior to the UNIX programs they were meant to replace.

All current versions of Windows are descended from Windows NT, and not from the DOS shells that were also called Windows.

Though 64-bit Intel processors are already available in 2004, a 64-bit version of Windows is still years away.
This program requires Microsoft Windows.
by Shaka Zulu September 03, 2004
A shitty OS that is impossible to run for more than 10 minutes without crashing. Only somewhat good version ever made is 200 0 Pro. Costs too much (even tho linux users can afford it, because most windows users drive a rice rocket and linux users dont even need to drive because their computers are so fast they can sit down on them and ride them around) and is the best $500 solitare game ever made. Uses stolen Mac code and
requires an update every day. Linux only needs to be updated when a cool new program comes out. Linux is impossible to crash (which is why it is used to run most servers.) Windows is Homo-approved. If you are currently running windows (which i am NOT) then either partition it and put lindows on one drive OR just delete windows completely - it is useless. Linux is now offically compatible with most programs. Format C: NOW!
"Aw shit my Windows comp froze!"
"Windows costs too much"
"I think its time i format windows"
"Windows is for noobs!"
"Linux is 133t when compared to windows!"
"Windows Sucks!"
by Manella April 08, 2003
A Bedroom game often played before a session of Dutch oven.
This definition has no relationship to Microsoft Windows(c)(t)(r), often described by persons who are new to computing as a computer operating system.
The male inserts all four fingers into his aroused partners vagina till completly covered in vaginal fluid. He then withdraws the hand and extends his fingers. If he does this without the transperant film of fluid breaking between all four fingers he has made 'windows'.
by Blue Cawdrey November 18, 2004
Hey "Smart people do not resist technology", go suck your mommy's penis!
"Smart people do not resist technology" fucked Bill Gates and got the AIDS!
by NiggaRatchie October 19, 2003
The prototype for the Doomsday operating system called Microsoft Skynet(tm), which became self-aware six weeks after it was released.
The movie Terminator is just a warning to all those who use Windows as their operating system.
by John Connor August 17, 2003
Aaaargh...... It chrashes every five minutes or so!!!!!!!!
by peacelovinhippy May 22, 2003
Ok, to all the noobs who say Windows is crap. Fuck you. There are many reasons why windows isn't crap.

1) I've used Windows for 6 years and never once did I get this constant error crap and it DOES WORK!!!!!
2) If you think only Clippy is annoying, then fucking change it! Even a 5 year old can figure that out.
3) Why don't YOU try getting a copy of a good game for Macintosh!?
4) All those Windows simulators on the web are funny but FUCKING FALSE!!!! No, Bill Gates doesn't send you mail. You know how many crap he gets on Outlook every day? 4 million at least.
5) So some of the programs suck. INSTALL NEW ONES, GODDAMNIT!
6) Blue screen errors only happen if it is REALLY serious. Not when you just open the C: drive and then boom. Blue screen. That shit is a damn lie that only assholes believe.

And finally...

7) DOS sucks.

And that's my two cents on Windows.
N00b: Dude, I just got Windows and it sucks. I keep getting blue screens.
Guy: No you don't.
N00b: Uh...yes I do fuck you lololololol.
Guy: So suggest a better one.
N00b: Uh...um...DOS?
Guy: Die, bitch.

*Guy shoots noob with a rocket launcher repeatedly*
by Anti-Noob patrol March 30, 2006
Just another pane in the glass.
by Anonymous July 03, 2003

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