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1.
When a previous experience in the restroom with low quality toilet paper results in dinglberries so large that one cannot proceed to take a shit; this then will require immediate removal of the berries so you will be forced to take a shower in a non-familiar location without the proper resources to get the job done, so only one option remains.... your hand
Dude, I had the worst case of Vic-Hand today after taking a dump at Nicks. His toilet paper was so shitty.
by Your own worst enemy April 18, 2011