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1.
Ultraforge

30-something white trash youtube troll.
Spends copious amounts of time "pissing off" strangers on youtube (which, if you don't know, is the premiere place for loudmouth morons to spew hate rhetoric about such edgy targets as: Jews, Niggers, Fags, Emos, Liberals, Furries, Fags and Fags)

Desperate for attention, Ultraforge lives to piss people off. He adheres to the age old ignorant opinion, that the internet is some fantasy land where assholes can pop a squat and shit in public all day long.

In actuality, Ultraforge, is an atypical bored, suburban, married chode, with tons of time and internet access.

In between Nascar, WWE and beating his wife -due to his impotent, wretched existence- Ultraforge takes out his aggression from the safety of his PC, like most Youtube assclowns. He lacks talent, humor, or the personality to garner attention so, he sadly resorts to insults a 6th grader would pass on.

He also tends to cry like a bitch when someone blocks him from their channel or, someone trolls him.

His most common enemies, are 13 year old girls, emos, furries and, people with an ounce, or more, of dignity. Only easy targets that, require little effort or courage to assault. In short, he's a titanic pussy. An impotent weakling taking cheat shots from his trailer.

He's far too much of a pussy to hit anyone with clout so he settles for light weight shit. Thus, he is a joke to trolls. He is however, strong enough to deny the obvious fact that he has no life.

Typical of shock value losers, he fills his profile with "shocking" quotes and images, like giving the finger (oooh my delicate sensibilities!) and the old "Yeah I love pissing people off!" admittance.

He apparently belongs to a group of "dedicated trolls" Which, might actually be the saddest thing I've ever read.

A member of the FCTC, which is a little boys club for poser trolls who brag about trolling like children brag about Pokemon collecting. Ultraforge uses inane rants about such hot button topics as Juggalos, furries and Jonas Brothers fans. Even most trolls hate these losers.

They needed to hype themselves with a weak ass ED entry and were properly beaten into the ground for it.

What this means is that a few of his equally bored, dead inside, Dale Earnhardt jr. KFC bucket collecting, frog sticking, toe losing, cousin fucking buddies, shout "fag" in unison at strangers on teh interwebz for hyucks.

If he weren't a grown man, this might be acceptable. However, this sad sack is actually married with a child on the way. He's even featured his wife as trophy and hid behind his own child to justify his pathetic obsession with stupid sub cultures.

He also tends to spam the same lame responses of "internet superhero" and the oft misused "Strawman" words he learned on ED.

The amazing thing is, many of his video's exhibit massive, blatant emo tendencies. Such as, waxing poetically about how emos don't deserve the right to live and, similar over the top prose about whatever sub-culture has his little panties in a twist this week.

If emos allow their emotions to override reason, than surely a grown man who produces dozens of videos to bitch and whine about them, is guilty of the same thing.

But what good troll isn't a raging hypocrite?

Hopefully, when his unfortunate spawn grows up, changes their name and moves out of the trailer, they can show the world that even though they were brought into the world by a hateful, little man-child, they can still amount to something. Even if, mommy and daddy were turned down for promotions at the dirt factory.
Ultraforge is a prime example of the Internet Fuckwad Theory.
by esper777 May 17, 2009