An extremely overrated book read by the likes of fangirls. Who adore Edward Cumchunks, even though he's just text and does not exist. Has a very terrible storyline having to do with a stereotypical teen girl falling in love with a vampire. There is absolutely no literature value coming with it.
Twilight fan girl: OMG twilight rulleeezzz , i saw the movie likez 10 times. Edward is like so dreamy and hot.
Person with taste in books : Shut up you ignorant pre-teen. Twilight is a terrible book. Go and read something with actual literature value, like the lord of the rings, a clockwork orange, to kill a mockingbird, 1984, the silence of the lambs the adventures of Tom Sawyer.
Twilight fan girl: Yourrr a faggg, Twilight rulez ur just jelos tat ur not fameos like ppl in da twilight movie. Only gay people hate twilight
Person with taste in books: ....... (walks away)
The first in a series of four books that are written horribly, are extremley repetitive in terms of adjectives and contains vampires that sparkle in the sun. About 45% of the pages in all 4 books combined are spent describing Edward Cullens 'cold, hard skin' and his "smoldering eyes". oh, and how his 'cold hard skin' *sparkles* in the sunlight. Did i mention its also extremley repetitive?
The main character is Bella Swan who is a stupid whore who depends totally on her trophy boyfriend to protect her from other vampires who want to do everyone a favour and kill her. (which is a shame they dont because shes so annoying)
Random Person: I read the first chapter of Twilight and lost approximatley 20% of my brain cells. The effects were especially noticable in todays math class
Probably the worst series of books,
that later turned into one of the worst movie, ever created.
The story revolves around the protagonist Bella Swan, who is the average every day MaryJane new girl in town, with not-so-special looks, and personality.
But dispite all of that, the most inhumanely gorgeous boy, Edward Cullen, catches interest in her. That is just one of the many cliches displayed in this book.
Another being that he is a vampire who thirsts the most for Bella's blood, yet ironically loves her.
Woah, no one saw any of this coming. I could hardly stomache reading it. Every other sentance is describing Edward's perfect face, and body, and whatever, which leads me to believe Stephenie Meyer has some severe issues living in a sad fantasy to escape the reality she didn't marry someone like that.
Though I did not read the last one, I was told Edward and Bella have sex and produce some kind of mutant half vampire half human offspring. Which furthers Stephenie's perversions. It's a teen book for god's sake, keep that shit to yourself.
The fact that the book is about an average everyday girl like most of us, who finds the perfect boy is the perfect ploy to bring in naive lonely tween girls to purchase this horrible cliche book.
Though dispite how truely awful, and lacking in any literary devices it is, it was turned into a movie. Which proved that the movie industry has gone to shit.
The acting was nothing special, and the scenes moved so fast it seemed unreal....
A plot used by the book companies to assassinate the new president.
Phase 1: The book companies hire a author to write a book that will give fat chicks hope that a vampire will stumble upon them and fall in love with them. It makes since seeing as how, with a few exceptions, fat chicks are reading the books.
Phase 2: They make a movie, the fat chicks go to the movie and spend an assload on snacks.
Phase 3:The movie theaters send the snack money back to the Book companies who then hire a gunman.
Phase 4: Dead president...while its still unclear as to why there doing this it is a threat we must all face.
Fat Chick: I'm going to buy twilight.
Guy: Are you trying to get our president shot?
Total bullshit. Piece of trash. Lame.
Whatever inside Twilight.
Brainwashing at it's finest.
Worst book in existence, not worth your time.
Rabid Twilight fan: OMGZZZ!!eleven!11! EDWARD ROX MAH SOXXXX!!! HE ISH TEH BEST MAN IN TEH UNIVERZZZ!!!
Girl #2: No he's not. He's just a word.
Normal person: Dude, turn off the capslock.
I would probably find it difficult to go on without this book. Not because I'm in love with Mr. Topaz Eyes Sparklepants either. I personally think he has to be the flattest, dullest character ever written in as wish fulfillment for a lonely and delusional woman who apparently never got over her teenage emo phase. Twilight helps me go on, simply, because on some days, fantasizing about brutally killing every diehard Twilight fan that ever lived is my only reason for living. Just kidding. But I will bitch-slap one of them someday. Seriously. Watch me.
OTF (Obsessive Twilight Fan): OMG I can't believe how amazing Eclipse was! Oh but poor Bella who will she choose? I hope she chooses Jake! Because then Edward will be ALL MINE! OMG I love vampires!
Seriously. You all are pathetic. If there were such a thing as real vampires, I would love for you to run into one, just so you could see how pitifully wrong your sparkly gorgeous misconceptions are.