A Turd Monger is somebody that produces particularly strong, foul smelling bowel movements. This individual can be an extreme source of frustration to others that happen to walk into a restroom recently utilized by this culprit or happen to share occupancy in a restroom when this offender decides to unload. It can be even more frustrating if you walk into a polluted restroom unknowingly after the perpetrating Turd Monger used it, do an immediate about face and pass someone else on the way in. They immediately assume you're the pollutant and give you the look of death.
Holly shit, I was about to hit the head when I saw that Turd Monger Jimmy Brown walking out. The last time I was nailed by the fumes of his posterior emissions my eyes burned for hours. Christ, at my worst, I can't come close to what comes out of his crack. I'm surprised the smoke detectors didn't go off. No wonder the fucking ozone is disappearing!
by Big Ed Moustapha July 21, 2010
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A Turd Monger is someone who has reached a state of having to pass a heavy bowel movement. The Turd Monger however, will not immediately relieve him/herself. Instead, they will allow their bowels to continue to expand as their fecal matter increases, resulting in noisomeness, gaseous emissions (commonly referred to as pre-shit farts) to be excreted from their posterior orifice while being within a close proximity of others. These exudations are generally quite robust and are slow to dissipate, thus resulting in a prolonged period of olfactory anguish to the recipients within range.
It's about time that damn Turd Monger Ricky decided to go and unload! Christ, that chair of his must be explosive by now, considering all the gas he's pumped into it.
by Big Ed Moustapha February 24, 2010
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A person who main income is derived by selling shit and dung. Genrally used as an insult to someone's ability at anything.

Also: Shit Monger (being polite)
Why did you do that! Your such a turd monger!!!

Why don't you go peddle your turds else where you turd monger!
by Mark January 9, 2003
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A Turd Monger is a member of the human species that relies on the lowest common denominator known to humanity, the 'Turd' for survival.

The Turd Monger proceeds to hypothesise that other people will barter\trade\sell\purchase his Turds. He namely defines himself as a mongerer. Yes a mongerer of Turds.

It is commonly believed that the first known Turd Mongerer was Judas Iscariot a follower of the christ that was mislead through his personal hypothesis on the value of his own Turds, based on these ground the Messiah was forced to oust him from possession within the heavenly kingdom.
1. Andrew was mongered for a turd and now he is the chief Turd mongerer for the west coast BBD posse!

2. Yo are you trying to monger me a Turd Fool?

3. Don't talk about my mother that was fool!
by Brown Edition August 10, 2007
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Triggen Alcastor
Wow, some real turd mongers play Star Wars Galaxies
by He who is righteous April 2, 2004
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One who handles turds of all shapes and sizes. A wanker or piss-ant.
guy #1: Look at that guys mullet.

guy #2: yeah, he must be a turd monger.
by greazy cheazy September 15, 2009
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1. An eater of shyst
2. Also known as the asshole in a card game.
1. That guy is meng, he's a turd monger
2. Meng Huo: JP, why are you always the turd monger? You suck!
JP: You sunk my battleship.
by Meng September 1, 2004
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