Tubicus was a great orangutan warlord who ruled over northeast asia during the Yin dynasty. He used to wear the heads of enemys in a chain around his neck and was renouned for his ferousity. He died in the middle of the Mai dynasty when a jealous contender for his throne took matters into their own hands and rammed a white hot poker up his ass. He was buried on top of Mount Syan and the whole of Asia spent 3 months in mourning.
Orangutan warlord. Ruled in the Yin dynasty. Harry Potter five should be burnt.