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203. Townie
Young people aged 9-21 seen hanging round the local chippy because they think that they're 'hard'. Often seen wearing tacky 'gold' 'jewellery', fake 'Adidas' trousers tucked into their white socks, a fake Burberry cap pointed at such a ridiculous angle that when it comes to blocking the sun, there is actually no point in wearing it except to look like a total prat. Most townies swagger round in a stupidly exaggerated way, swaying from side to side and bobbing up and down more than is absolutely necessary, saying ‘Yeah, Ah’m cool, Ah’m cool, bling bling yeah innit’, etc, etc.
Their shoes are 'polished' until they're so blindingly bright, they look as if they're new and freshly stolen from 'JJL'.

Rules Of Life For Normal People

1. If you see a chav, kick him very hard in his non-existent balls.

2. If you want to find a townie, go to the nearest crappy sports shop.

3. All townies and chavs are right bastards.

4. Expressions that townies and chavs think are ‘cool’ are: Sound, safe, bling, bang out, innit mon, batty boy, rough, ratty, and any other phrases that don’t actually mean anything.

5. If you do hear something like ‘Bang out, innit mon, like’, go to the source of the sound, and kill wichever townie happens to be there, as all of these people are useless bastards with no actual purpose in life.

7. Most chav and townies if they see a fight or someone really insults another person, they will make a pointless sound that goes like ‘Oh oh ohh’.

8. If a chav or townie that is feeling particularly pointless or gay, they will come up to you, puff their pathetic little chest at you, and go ‘Yeah, yeah, come on then’, and they will then probably make up a false accusation such as: ‘Wot you say ‘bout ma mum?, or: ‘Did you call me a paedo?’. If this happens, hit them.

9. Chavs and townies also have this thing with whacking their first finger down onto the middle finger. They think this is really cool, but in actual fact, it is incredibly gay.

10. Chavs and Townies can also be distinguished by the way they walk. They walk in a ridiculously exaggerated way, and swaying from side to side and bobbing up and down more than is absolutely necessary, saying ‘Yeah, Ah’m cool, Ah’m cool’, etc, etc.

11. Chavs and Townies also think it is incredibly cool to boast about beating someone up to their so-called ‘mates’.

12. Chavs and Townies also have this peculiar habit of clapping when someone is insulted or ‘rinsed’.

13. They say ‘like’ every other word.

14. They think drugs, smoking and drinking are cool at an early age.

15. The word (well, not actually a word), ‘innit’ is used as a full stop. E.g. ‘Ah ‘ad yo ma last night, yeah, innit’!
Townie 1: Innit mon, yeah like, got some fuckin' 'eavy shit 'ere

Townie 2: Innit

Townie 1: Yeah like

Townie 2: Bling
by townie hater Mar 23, 2005 add a video
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1. townie
The most common use for the word 'townie' in England is that which describes a person.

A townie is normally aged between 11 and 15. Listens to so-called 'garage' music such as Blazin' Squad and So Solid Crew, neither of which is REAL garage music; simply pop music with a stammering kid in fake diamonds fronting the band.

A townie will normally dress in grubby shell-toed Nike trainers, rolled-up Adidas tracksuit bottoms and an unmatching jogging top, regardless of the sex.
If female, the jogging jacket will most likely be pink or baby blue, most likely purchased for £5 at the local market and will have the word 'PRINCESS', 'BABE', 'BLING BLING' or 'FCUK' spelt out in white across the front.
If male, the townie's jogging top will most likely be white with blue sleeves, again purchased for £5 at a market; and will have the name of an American city spelt out across the front, ie. 'BOSTON', 'DETROIT', or 'CUBA'; ..despite the fact that these creatures are not intelligent enough to know where the places they advertise on their chests are. Most, upon asking, will not even realize that 'BOSTON' is a city.

A townie will often smoke because "it's alrigh', innit?". All townies own at least one item of clothing with the disgusting beige/brown Burberry print upon it. Obviously, this garment is not genuine Burberry, and instead of the £400 charged for a real Burberry bag/scarf, will have been purchased for £1.50 down the local market.

A female townie will have poorly dy...
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by heebiejeebies Jun 14, 2003 add a video
2. townie
A townie is a the label for a group of people who shit on the english language, wear crappy ripoff adidas clothes, have an I.Q. lower than than my nan's tits, and are as ugly as a hatfull of ass.

Other word/s for townie: scum.
Townie: Like my 2-strip adidas, innit? Ye ye ye safe bruv!

Normal Person: You are scum.
3. townie
Ahh townies, the uncomplicated, uninteresting and wholly unneeded scum of any urban area across the face of the UK. These..."people" (sorry to all you normal people out there, I realize calling townies people is an insult to you all) are generally, in fact ALWAYS doing nothing with their life, unless of course your idea of living is hanging around outside the local corner shop, car park or McDonalds shouting abuse at anyone not wearing burberry, drinking stolen alcohol and smoking/sniffing/trying to fuck drugs.
They clad themselves in burberry, nike, adidas, umbro and avirex clothing, the males anyway. They always smell like stolen Hugo Boss aftershave, or at least the stolen, cheap, knock off market version of Hugo Boss. The males all follow an alpha male, they imitate his trends and language, in my area the words to desbribe a good looking female are "buff" or "tick" if something is good or acceptable it is "safe" and your friend is your "blood" often pronounced "blud" they will often pick on anyone with black clothing, spiky hair or baggy jeans, but will only attack in groups of 10 or more, if their "crew" isn't present (probably off stealing fake burberry, or dealing flour) they will stand at a safe range and hurl insults like "goff" "mosha" "grunga" or the ever popular "I fucked ur mum!" these insults should be shrugged off, however if you feel the need to retaliate, I recommend these:-
In response to "goff", "mosha" or "grunga" - Yes I am a <enter above instult her...
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by Hex_xagram Aug 18, 2004 add a video
4. townie
Outside of england, this is a term used by students who have went to a new city for school to describe the natives of that town. It is often seen as derogitory by those who use it, but townies themselves often embrace it as a badge of honour.
"man there are so many townies at this party"

"so where are you from?"
"oh I'm a townie"
5. townie
A townie is an English word for a person who:
1. Uses the phrase "Ya Mum" as an insult
2. Thinks that it is cool/hard to use various words beginning with F and S
3. Listens to "Phat Beats" - Blazin Squad, So Solid Crew, Jay-Z (or whatever) etc.
4. Drives a Car such as a Vauxhall Nova or Ford Escort or similar which has A body kit, lowerred suspension, large exhaust, and a huge Subwoofer in the boot to make sure that everyone can hear their "Phat Beats"
5. Has a stupid nickname such as "Jubba" or "Staples"
6. Steals mobile phones
7. Wears "Bling Threads"
8. Walks in a stupid, exaggerated way
9. Has a fundamental disability to pronounce the letter "H"
10. Smokes all the time whilst doing the above
11. Is challenged by a lack of immagination
12. Has a Helly Hansen "Puffer Jacket"
13. Has gelled blonde (dyed) hair
by Tommo Aug 4, 2003 add a video
6. Townie
The townie (tracksuits retardus) are hideous creatures which roam the lands of England. They tend to be known as chavs, neds or basically just fucking assholes.

The male of the species tend to be called 'Gav', 'Gaz', 'Baz', 'Nat' or 'Matty'. He tends to have a shaved head, to make him look 'rock 'ard, innit', or in modern English, tough. Although townies are racist towards asians, they accept black people into their 'crew', and the black townies tend to bleach their hair yellow (blonde). Their hides tend to consist of (fake) Burberry caps, hoodies over the top, with the hood constantly up, matching tracksuit bottoms with the lines down the side, and white trainers. They also tend to wear plastic rings from the 20 pence (British money) plastic jewelry vending machines. They buy all their 'bling' or 'heavy shit' with money stolen from their parents or 5-year-olds which they beat up, money found on the floor, or from drug dealing and their girlfriends' prostitution, which brings me onto the female of the species.

Female townies tend to be named after dolls, or celebrities such as 'Britney' or 'Jordan' (Americans, Jordan is a page 3 model famous for her massive big tits). There are two types of female townie. There is the Stripy Pink ...
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by Arran Dec 4, 2004 add a video
7. townie
1. Used to denote a person living in the community who does not attend or work for the college or university.

2. A college-aged person who never leaves the town in which, they went to high school in and they do not work attend any form of college.

3. A local, or person who lives in their place of birth.
1. Those townies brought beer for the kegger!

2. You're 22 and doing nothing! You're a townie bum!

3. My dad was born in Boston, we're townies.
by DSpetz Jul 17, 2005 add a video
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