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1.
The Tanning Horse is a steamy, romantic, and often rough and dangerous act of sexual intercourse or intense dry (soon to be wet) humping, where the dude is laying down with his back facing the ground, and his elbows propping him up as if he were tanning. The lady is riding on top of him like she would if she was riding horseback, resembling a Tanning Horse. To spice things up a wee bit, the lady can sensually apply whipped cream to the dude's chest to resemble sunscreen, as she may lick it off his most-likely hairy chest. This sex position is similar to the cowgirl position.
Dude: "Ohhhh, YESSSSSS!"
Lady: "OHHHHHHHHHHHHhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh.... YEEEEEEEESSSSSSSSSS!"
*15 minutes later*
Dude: "Mmmm..... oh, yeah..... oh, ho HO!!!!"
Lady: *enjoyment fades*
Dude: "What's wrong?"
Lady: "I am tired of doing doggy style; can we try The Tanning Horse?"
Dude: "Hell, yeah, baby! Let me go get the whipped cream!"
by The Tanning Horse October 24, 2010